As long as you keep your work zipped up around me, I don't give a rat-crap what or where you shove your show. Are we done being neighbors for now?

Melvin Udall

Brody: Marion's the least of your worries right now, believe me, Indy.
Indiana: What do you mean?
Brody: Well, I mean that for nearly three thousand years man has been searching for the lost ark. It's not something to be taken lightly. No one knows its secrets. It's like nothing you've ever gone after before.
Indiana: Oh, Marcus. What are you trying to do, scare me? You sound like my mother. We've known each other for a long time. I don't believe in magic, a lot of superstitious hocus pocus. I'm going after a find of incredible historical significance, you're talking about the boogie man. Besides, you know what a cautious fellow I am.

Sloth: Mama!
Mama Fratelli: Come to mama Slothy, come on hmm?
Sloth: Mama, you've been bad.
Mama Fratelli: Oh, Slothy. I may have been bad. I may have kept you chained up in that room but it was for your own good.
Sloth: Yeah!
Mama Fratelli: You remember that song I used to sing to you?
Sloth: Yeah!
Mama Fratelli: You were little back then?
Mama Fratelli: Rock-a-bye baby on the tree top. When the wind blows the cradle will rock. When the bough breaks the cradle will fall...
Sloth: Break! Fall!
Mama Fratelli: No! I only dropped once.
Sloth: Ahh!
Mama Fratelli: Well, maybe twice. No Sloth! Put me down!

Brian: First of all to understand what happened to killer, you gotta understand who killer the dog was. Now killer was born to a three-legged bitch of a mother. He was always ashamed of this, man. And then right after that he's adopted by this man, Tito Liebowitz he's a small time gun runner and a rotweiler fight promoter. So he puts killer into training. They see killer's good. He is damn good. But then he had the fight of his life. They pit him against his brother nibbles. And killer said "no man that's my brother, I can't fight nibbles" but they made him fight anyway, and killer, he killed nibbles. Killer said "that's it!" he called off all his fights, and he started doing crack, and he freaked out. Then in a rage, he collapsed, and his heart no longer beat. wow.
Thurgood Jenkins: You know uh, I never thought I'd say this to anybody, but you two smoke entirely too much reefer.

Matilda: When I was in 7th grade, I was... the fat kid in my class.
Derek Zoolander: Ew!

Gun Salesman: We call this piece the Fecalator. One look at it and the target shits him or herself. Try it on.
Loki: Well, it's a lot more compact than the flaming sword, but it's not nearly as impressive. Just doesn't have that Wrath-of-the-Almighty edge to it. I mean, come on, how am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of the wicked with this thing? Look at this...
Bartleby: Well, then, you know, don't use a gun. Just lay the place to waste, like.
Loki: Easy for you to say. You get off light in razing. You got to stand there and read at Sodom and Gomorrah, I had to do all the work.
Bartleby: What work did you do? You lit a few fires.
Loki: I rained down sulphur, man, there's a subtle difference.
Bartleby: Oh, yeah, I'm sure.
Loki: Hey, you know, fuck you, man. Any moron with a pack of matches can set a fire. Raining down sulphur is like an endurance trial man. Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer.

Lee: [after the first show] That was amazing, you guys changed people's lives tonight.
KG: I know, it was so awesome dude.
JB: Yeah, it was awesome, compared to bullshit!

"Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho."

Hans Gruber

Cockburn, from now on my fist is going to be so far up your shithole that every time you have a thought, it's gonna have to tiptoe past my wedding ring...

Les Grossman

Ferris Bueller: Cameron, what have you seen today?
Cameron: Nothing good.
Ferris Bueller: Nothing - wha - what do you mean nothing good? We've seen everything good. We've seen the whole city! We went to a museum, we saw priceless works of art! We ate pancreas!

Peeta Mellark: They won't touch Prim!
Johanna Mason: Your fiancé's right. The whole country loves your sister. If they torture her, or do anything to her, forget the districts - there will be riots in the Capitol.
Johanna Mason: Hey, how does that sound Snow? What if we, what if we set your backyard on fire? You know you can't put everybody in here!
Johanna Mason: What? He can't hurt me. There's no one left that I love.

Russell: Oh! Mr. Fredricksen! If we happen to get separated, use the wilderness explorer call: "CA - CA! RAWRRR!"

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