Now he's going to play that damn Vicki Carr record, and when he comes to bed he won't touch me.

Rose

Nicholas Angel: You don't mind a bit of manpower, do ya Doris?
PC Doris Thatcher: [laughing] Oh, cheeky bastard!

The last time I had a pap smear, the guy needed leather gloves and an oyster shucker.

Magda

For the record, there aren't 400 people in that container. Only 395 made it here alive.

Darren 'Wall Street' Bettencourt

Dan Evans: You say one more word, I'll cut you down right here.
Ben Wade: I like this side of you, Dan.

Hands in, a-ca-bitches!

Aubrey

Your mother's in here, Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it.

Demon

Kumar: Now we're in Newark, of all places. You know we're gonna get shot.
Harold: Maybe it's not as bad as they say. Maybe it's just a bunch of hype.
Kumar: Check it out. Those guys look like a lame version of us.
[2 guys get jumped and beaten with a 2x4 and other weapons]
Harold, Kumar: Holy shit!
[assailants stop beating up 2 guys, look up and pause, then continue with the assaults while the 2 men lay on the ground moaning]
Harold: Let's get the fuck outta here. Go! Go! Drive! Drive!

Joe: We won't breathe a word!
Spats Colombo: You won't breathe nothin' - not even air.

Andrew Beckett: Do you like opera?
Joe Miller: I'm not that familiar with opera.
Andrew Beckett: This is my favorite aria. This is Maria Callas. This is "Andrea Chenier", Umberto Giordano. This is Madeleine. She's saying how during the French Revolution, a mob set fire to her house, and her mother died... saving her. "Look, the place that cradled me is burning." Can you hear the heartache in her voice? Can you feel it, Joe? In come the strings, and it changes everything. The music fills with a hope, and that'll change again. Listen... listen..."I bring sorrow to those who love me." Oh, that single cello! "It was during this sorrow that love came to me." A voice filled with harmony. It says, "Live still, I am life. Heaven is in your eyes. Is everything around you just the blood and mud? I am divine. I am oblivion. I am the god... that comes down from the heavens, and makes of the Earth a heaven. I am love!... I am love."

Nicko! Don't play with the food! When I was your age ... we didn't have food!

Maria Portokalos

You know Jules, there is the brink of insanity and then there is the abyss, which obviously you have fallen into!

Kevin

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