Terry Fields: Pardon me, sir, but I lost my I.D. in... in a flood and I'd like to get some Old Harper, hard stuff. Would you mind buying a bottle for me?
Bum at Liquor Store: Why certainly! I lost my wife, too - her name wasn't Idy, though, and it wasn't in a flood - but I know what ya...
Terry Fields: Thanks, here's enough for a pint.

Holden: Ah, come on, that's a bunch of horse shit! Lando Calrissian was a black guy. You know, and he got to fly the Millennium Falcon, what's the matter with you?
Hooper: Who said that?
Holden: I did! Lando Calrissian is a strong role model in the realm of science fiction and fantasy.
Hooper: Fuck Lando Calrissian! Uncle Tom nigger!

Oh, hello. You're, uh, you're probably here about the story. Elves love to tell stories. I... I'll bet you didn't know that about elves. There's, uh, probably a lot of things you didn't know about elves. Another, another interesting, uh, elfism, uh, there are only three jobs available to an elf. The first is making shoes at night while, you know, while the old cobbler sleeps.

Papa Elf

Charlotte has pudding in her Prada.

Miranda Hobbes

Tiny: Wayne. How you doin'?
Wayne Campbell: Hey, Tiny, who's playing today?
Tiny: Jolly Green Giants and the Shitty Beetles.
Wayne Campbell: Shitty Beetles? Are they any good?
Tiny: They suck.
Wayne Campbell: Then it's not just a clever name.

Minstrel: [singing] Brave Sir Robin ran away...
Sir Robin: *No!*
Minstrel: [singing] bravely ran away away...
Sir Robin: *I didn't!*
Minstrel: [singing] When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
Sir Robin: *I never did!*
Minstrel: [singing] Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out.
Sir Robin: *Oh, you liars!*
Minstrel: [singing] Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin.

Mike Dexter: Who's gonna want you now?
Amanda Becket: [Looking at letter] Somebody.
Mike Dexter: Somebody? More like... nobody!
Amanda Becket: Gosh, Mike. You really got me.

[Faye is confronted by her boss]
Faye: I'm not daydreaming.
Manager of 'Midnight Express: Right. You're not daydreaming. You're sleepwalking.

I visited your home this morning after you'd left. I tried to play husband. I tried to taste the life of a simple man. It didn't work out, so I took a souvenir... her pretty head.

John Doe

Earl Partridge: Phil. Phil. Hey, come here. Come here. Uh... Phil. I'm... I'm gonna try... talk. I'm gonna try to say something-something. Do you know Lily, Phil? Do you know her? Lily?
Phil Parma: No, I don't.
Earl Partridge: Oh, she's my love, my life, love of it. Y'know. In school... I'm twelve years old, in school, in sixth grade. I saw her. I didn't go to that school, but... uh... we met. My friend knew her. I said, uh...”What's that girl? How's that Lily?" "Oh, she's bad. She sleeps with guys." Yeah, he said this, but then sometimes... I went to another school, you see. But then... when high school - at an end. What is that when it gets to the end?
Phil Parma: Graduation.
Earl Partridge: No, no, the grade. What grade are you in?
Phil Parma: That's 12th.
Earl Partridge: Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Taj: Doesn't she have a boyfriend?
Van Wilder: Details. Only details.

My quest has taken me through the physical, the metaphysical, the delusional and back...

Nash

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