Thurgood Jenkins: Yeah, get me a box of condoms, and, what was that thing we used to eat back in the day? What was it... oh yeah, pussy.
Kenny: You got it.

Jehovah's Witness: Are you prepared for Jehovah's return? 'Cause if you're not, we've got a pam...
[Craig slams the door in their faces]
Jehovah's Witness: Well fuck you. Half-dead motherfucker. Come on, sister.

Mr. Rate: That's how a conspiracy works. Them boys on the Grassy Knoll they were dead within three hours, buried in the damned desert, unmarked graves out past Terlingua.
Nick Memphis: You know this for a fact?
Mr. Rate: Still got the shovel...

[yelling] I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and piss in your dead skull! You f--ked with the wrong Marine!

Col. Jessep

Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis and the rise of the sons of Aryas, there was an age undreamed of. And unto this, Conan, destined to wear the jeweled crown of Aquilonia upon a troubled brow. It is I, his chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga. Let me tell you of the days of high adventure!

The Wizard

Ron Burgundy: I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you.
[Veronica turns and walks away]
Ron Burgundy: Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I... I wanna be on you.

Anakin: If you are suffering as much as I am, please tell me.
Padme: I can't... We can't... It's not possible.
Anakin: Anything is possible, Padme, listen to me.
Padme: No you listen! We live in a real world, come back to it. You're studying to become a Jedi, I'm... I'm a senator. If you follow your thoughts through to conclusion, it will take us to a place we cannot go, regardless of the way we feel about each other.

Caroline: [holding her son's dirty hand] Is this chocolate or poop? Is this chocolate or poop?!
Caroline: [licks son's hand and smiles] It's chocolate!
Kate Holbrook: What if that had been poop?!

[to Batman] You've changed things... forever. There's no going back. See, to them, you're just a freak... like me!

The Joker

I wear them front, I wear them back, I go inside out, then I go front and back.

Fred

I passed through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gum drops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel.

Buddy

[speaking to Harvey Dent] I don't get political points for being an idealist... I have to do the best I can with what I have.

Lt. James Gordon

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