Advices from Lincoln report that Jose Chavez Y Chavez moved to California where he changed his name and took work on a fruit ranch. Josiah 'Doc' Scurlock is reported to have left the West for the East, taking with him a celestial bride, her mother and fourteen brothers and sisters. Susan McSween went on to see both her husband's and John Tunstall's dreams to fruition, by becoming one of most prominent cattlewomen of all time. Governor Axtel was forced to resign by President Rutherford B. Hayes and both the Murphy-Dolan faction and the Santa Fe Ring collapsed. William H. Bonney, also known as 'Billy the Kid' continued to ride, never leaving New Mexico. He was caught in Fort Sumner by Sheriff Pat Garret and killed. Sources report that he was unarmed, and shot in the dark. He was buried with Charley Bowdre at Old Fort Sumner. Advices report that sometime later, an unidentified person snuck into the graveyard and chiseled an inscription. The epitaph read only one word... 'Pals'.

Doc

Captain Steven Hiller: Was that an earthquake?
Jasmine Dubrow: Not even a four pointer. Go back to sleep.

Watto: How are you going to pay for all this?
Qui-Gon Jinn: I have 20,000 Republic dataries.
Watto: Republic credits? Republic credits are no good out here. I need something more real.
Qui-Gon Jinn: I don't have anything else [waves hand] but credits will do fine.
Watto: No, they won't.
Qui-Gon Jinn: [waves hand again] Credits will do fine.
Watto: No, they won't-a. What? You think you're some kind of Jedi, waving your hand around like that? I'm a Toydarian, mind tricks don't work on me. Only money. No money, no parts, no deal!

Danny Butterman: So what made you want to become a policeman?
Nicholas Angel: Officer.
Danny Butterman: What made you want to become a policeman officer?
Nicholas Angel: I can't remember a time when I didn't want to be a police officer, except for the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the frog. I remember when I was five, my uncle Derek bought me a police pedal car. There wasn't a minute of the day I spent out of that car. I went round - arresting kids much bigger than me. I got beaten up a lot, but it didn't stop me.
Danny Butterman: Man, he sounds like a great guy!
Nicholas Angel: Actually he was arrested for selling drugs to students, probably bought the pedal car with the proceeds.
Danny Butterman: What a cunt.
Nicholas Angel: Naturally, I never went near it again. I just left it there in the yard to gather rust. But I never lost the profound sense of right and wrong I felt behind the wheel of that pedal car. And I always wanted to be a police officer, from that moment on.
Danny Butterman: Oh. Shame really...
Nicholas Angel: How so?
Danny Butterman: I think you would have made a great Muppet...

French journalist: Inspector, do you know if the killer was a man or woman?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Well of course I know that! What else is there? A kitten?

Now that's what I call high quality H2O.

Bobby Boucher

Austin: All I said was: "I'm pretending to whisper a big secret in your ear so that Jake here thinks I'm telling you a secret, which will cause him to break into a hysterical confession where he actually reveals a big secret. Thus confirming everything I just whispered in your ear."

Ron Burgundy: Um, Brick, before I let you go, are you still having your celebrity golf tournament?
Brick Tamland: Um, no, no. Too many people died last year, so we're not gonna.

Roy, you're about to die. You're on the minute hand of a clock. My life is flashing before my eyes. Wait a minute. I don't remember her.

Roy

Free will, it is a bitch.

John Milton

Old Biff: Tough break, kid. Must be rough bein' named after a complete butthead.
Marty McFly: What's that supposed to mean?

Eve Kendall: I'm a big girl.
Roger Thornhill: Yeah, and in all the right places, too.

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