Freakshow: What the hell are you doing with my wife?
Harold: Y-you said outside that we could have sex with her!
Kumar: Shit! Shit!
Freakshow: I most certainly did not!
Harold: Yes you did!
Freakshow: Did not!
Kumar: Yes you did!
Freakshow: Oh, no, I didn't.
Kumar: You did, you did.
Freakshow: You sure...?
Harold: You said it!
Freakshow: [laughing] My mistake! Well, since we're all here... How 'bout a four-some?

When love and duty are one, grace is within you.

Mother Superior

Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown! T.E. Lawrence: Ah, well, we can't all be lion tamers.

Priest: What did you do Raymond?
Ray: Murder, father.
Priest: Why did you murder, Raymond?
Ray: For money.
Priest: You murdered for money?
Ray: Yes, father.
Priest: Who did you murder for money, Raymond?
Ray: You, father.

Hey, Kid! No scooter!

Lydia Lynch

Ok, you may have just seen a dude's junk. And he is very sorry.

Wallace Wells

Ray Charles: There's some things you're not understandin'...
Della Bea Robinson: Well, make me understand, Ray!
Ray Charles: Baby, when I walk out that door I walk out alone in the dark. I'm trying to do something ain't nobody ever done in music and business. But I can't do it if I'm alone everywhere I go. I don't wanna be alone here, Bea. Not in my own home. Look, Bea, if you don't understand me, then who will?

Madness! Madness!

Major Clipton

[remembering the time he had with Brian] I used to say I live my life a quarter mile at a time and I think that's why we were brothers - because you did too. No matter where you are, whether it's a quarter mile away or half way across the world. The most important thing in life will always be the people in this room, right here, right now. Salute mi familia. You'll always be with me. And you'll always be my brother.

Dominic Toretto

You're a human who knows entirely too much about us. They could kill us all.

Alice

Looks like we got us a sow here instead of a boar.

Mountain Man

You pair of deuces lookin' for work, I suggest you get your scrawny asses in here pronto.

Joe Aguirre

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