Jay: I am gonna hang your old ass by your turban.
Mooj: Oh, turban now! Do you see any fucking turban here? Do I talk like a turban guy? Do I say 'Hey Jay, you want a slippy? You wanna slippy?' Fuck you, okay? I was born in Brooklyn, Brooklyn, okay? My accent is a fucking Brooklyn accent, okay? Okay?

Alex: You are really good out there.
B. Rabbit: Where? In line at the lunch truck?

[last lines]
Narrator: They ruled for 80 years. But no man can live forever, except he who possesses the heart of a star, and Yvaine gave him hers entirely. After their children and grandchildren were grown, the time had come to light the babylon candle.
[there is a flash of light from inside the royal quarters, the camera then pans up to the sky where two brighter stars have appeared]
Narrator: and they still live happily ever after.

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: Ooh, I've heard of stuff like this.
Annie Savoy: Yeah? Have you heard of Walt Whitman?
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: No. Who's he play for?

Lena: Hey, how did your suckumentary turn out?
Tibby: Uh... uh... well, it actually evolved into something quite different than I expected, so...
Bridget: What are you gonna call it?
Tibby: [thinking] Hmmmm... Bailey.

We're all going to die and they're never going to give me my license!

Michael

Mares eat oats, and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy. A kid'll eat ivy, too... wouldn't you?

Carl Stargher

Sounds like big trouble. You're going to need plenty of legal advice before this thing is over. As your attorney, I advise you to rent a very fast car with no top. And you'll need the cocaine. Tape recorder for special messages. Acapulco shirts. Get the hell out of L.A. for at least 48 hours.

Dr. Gonzo

His name's Bison. I've tracked him through eleven major cities on four continents and never come close, not once. This guy walks through the raindrops. Anybody that's against him is either dead, or on their way.

Charlie Nash

Rod Tidwell: Who's your motherfucker?
Jerry Maguire: You're my motherfucker!

Jacob: This is scientifically possible!
Nick: Tell us how it's scientifically possible, Professor Hawking.
Jacob: I will, 'cause I write Stargate fan fiction; this is my bread and butter, man!
Nick: Oh my God, I seriously almost passed out you're such a dork.

Rob: Marvin Gaye.
Laura: I know.
Rob: Let's get it on. That's our song. Marvin Gaye is responsible for our entire relationship.
Laura: Oh, is that so? I'd like a word with him then.

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