Gen. Gray: Mr. President, I'd sure like to know what you're doing.
President Thomas Whitmore: I'm a combat pilot, Will. I belong in the air.

Dixie: Want anything? A drink?
C.D. Bales: Yeah, but if I ask for another one, give it to me.

My name is Robert Neville. I am a survivor living in New York City. I will be at the South Street Seaport everyday, at midday, when the sun is highest in the sky.

Neville

Commander Shears: You mean, you intend to uphold the letter of the law, no matter what it costs?
Colonel Nicholson: Without law, Commander, there is no civilization.
Commander Shears: That's just my point; here, there is no civilization.
Colonel Nicholson: Then we have the opportunity to introduce it.

Melvin Udall: Oh, you were talking about your dog. I thought you were referring to that colored man inside your apartment.
Simon Bishop: Uh, what color would that be?
Melvin Udall: Like uh, like thick MO-lasses.

Farva: MacAttack, wanna go punch for punch?
[Mac punches Farva in the stomach]
Farva: Oooh good one, I did not specify. Never shit a shitter.
[Ursula walks by]
Farva: Lady in blue comin' through.

Miss Ritter: Peter, don't make promises you can't keep.
Peter Parker: But those are the best kind.

Your watch is stuck in my pubes.

Deputy Trudy Wiegel

We consider ourselves bi-costal if you consider the Mississippi River one of the coasts.

Ron Albertson

Well, hello there, Mr. Neff.

Building attendant

Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.

Seagulls

Hutch: [after seeing the Grand Torino] Whoa! Your stock just went up in my book, my friend. Pop the hood, let me see what you got under...
Starsky: Hey! Hotshot! What do you think you're doing? This is a Ford Grand Torino. It's not some crappy camper slash apartment. There are rules.
Hutch: Okay, okay.
Starsky: You do not bang on the hood. You never under any circumstances drive. And you will certainly not put your coffee mug on the roof of the car. In fact, no coffee in the car whatsoever. Coffee goes on the ground, you get in the car, we go.

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