Maybe it's not racism. Maybe it's just placism. A brother needs to know his place.

Willie 'Alien' Beamen

Mongol General: What is best in life?
Conan: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

Brodie: Oh my God. Don't tell me you have no idea there's a movie being made of the comic you two were the basis for.
Jay: What? Since when?
Brodie: See, here's the pulse. And this is your finger, far away from the pulse, jammed straight up your ass. Say, would you like a chocolate covered pretzel?

Bart: You know, you really had me scared for a moment there.
Ollie: Aww, who knew. All these years you were nursing a little stage fright!
Bart: Not that smart ass.

You're fired!

Harry

Does it look like I got cunt written on my head? Who do you think you are fucking with?

Chev Chelios

[to Anna, who put her feet on his sled] Whoa, whoa, whoa, put your feet down. This is fresh lacquer. Seriously, were you raised in a barn?

Kristoff

I'll honor your traditions, I'll go to the Dean and I will lie.

David Green

Leon, somewhere in Libya right now, a janitor's working the night shift at Libyan Intelligence headquarters. He's going about doing his job... because he has no idea, in about an hour he's going to die in a massive explosion. He's just going about his job, because he has no idea that about an hour ago I gave an order to have him killed. You've just seen me do the least presidential thing I do.

President Andrew Shepherd

Buzz: How are you fixed for fuel? Are you still using fossil fuels, or have you discovered crystallic fusion?
Woody: Well, we have double-A's.

Charles: All these weddings, all these years, all that blasted salmon and champagne and here I am on my own wedding day, and I'm... eh... em... eh... still thinking.
Matthew: Well, can I ask about what?
Charles: No... no... I think, best not.

It’s just drinking games and bonding, why is that so painful for you?

Jenko

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