Jay: Man, my balls are shaved, my pubes are trimmed, I'm ready to fuckin' rock this shit!
Jonah: What the fuck, man? If I go in there and see fuckin' pubes sprinkled on the toilet seat, I'm gonna fuckin' loose my mind! Last time I went to the bathroom, Jay, I took a shit and my shit looked like a fuckin' stuffed animal!

What are you looking at? Huh? I'll kick your fucking ass, right now! What are you smiling at? Freshman faggot!

O'Bannion

Billy: Where ya from man?
Stranger on the Highway: Hard to say.

Nemo: Hey dad! Maybe when I'm at school, I'll see a shark.
Marlin: I highly doubt it.
Nemo: Have how ever met a shark?
Marlin: No, and I don't plan to.
Nemo: How old are sea turtles?
Marlin: Sea turtles? I don't know.
Nemo: Sandy Plankton from next door, he says they live to be 100.
Marlin: Well, if I ever meet a sea turtle I'll ask him, right after I'm done talking to the shark.

Madeliene White: Well, I'd love to tell you what a monster you are, but, uh, I have to help Bin Laden's nephew buy a co-op on Park Ave.
Arthur Case: [laughing] If that were true, you wouldn't tell me.
Madeliene White: [turning to leave] We're listing you as a reference.

Tyler Durden: I want you to hit me as hard as you can.
Narrator: What? In the face?
Tyler Durden: Surprise me.
Narrator: This is so fucking stupid.

Hey that's the motherf- I mean... that's the gentleman that had me busted.

Billy Ray Valentine

Kermit: And not one single person noticed I'd been replaced by an evil criminal mastermind?
Fozzie Bear: It sounds worse than it was...
Walter: No, it's as bad as it sounds.

Doc: Marty, I gave you explicit instructions not to come here but to go directly back to 1985.
Marty McFly: I know, Doc.
Doc: But it's good to see you, Marty.

Ray "Bones" Barboni: Let me explain something to you. Momo is dead. Which means that everything he had now belongs to Jimmy Cap, including you. Which also means, that when I speak, I speak for Jimmy. E.g., from now on, you start showing me the proper fucking respect.
Chili Palmer: "E.g." means "for example". What I think you want to say is "I.e.".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: Bullshit! That's short for "ergo".
Chili Palmer: Ask your man.
Bodyguard: To the best of my knowledge, "e.g." means "for example".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: E.g., i.e., fuck you! The point is this: is that, When I say "jump", you say "OK", okay?

Colonel Frank Fitts: Where did you get that?
Ricky Fitts: From my job.
Colonel Frank Fitts: Don't lie to me. Now, I saw you with him.
Ricky Fitts: You were watching me?

Victor Von Doom: Is that the best you can do? A little heat?
Reed Richards: Time for your lesson- Chem 101. What happens when you rapidly cool hot metal?

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