You must unlearn what you have learned.

Yoda

[Anouk has come home from school upset]
Vianne Rocher: Anouk, just tell me what happened?
Anouk Rocher: Are you Satan's helper?
Vianne Rocher: Well, it... it's not easy, being different.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't we go to church?
Vianne Rocher: Well, you can if you want... but it won't make things easier.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't you wear black shoes like the other mothers?

He wants the precious. Always he is looking for it. And the precious is wanting to go back to him... But we mustn't let him have it.

Gollum

Sir Alexander Dane: Could they be the miners?
Fred Kwan: Sure, they're like three years old.
Sir Alexander Dane: MINERS, not MINORS.
Fred Kwan: You lost me.

I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.

Agent Smith

The Donkey: So, uh, are there any donkeys up there?
Shrek: Well, there's, um, Gabby, the Small and Annoying.
The Donkey: Okay, okay, I see it now. The big shiny one, right there. That one there?
Shrek: That's the moon.
The Donkey: Oh, okay.

[to Caine] You're the perfect hunting machine

Stinger

Maggie Fitzgerald: She's tough, I can't go inside, I can't get close enough to hit her.
Frankie Dunn: You know why that is?
Maggie Fitzgerald: Why?
Frankie Dunn: Cause she's a better fighter than you are, that's why. She's younger, she's stronger, and she's more experienced. Now, what are you gonna do about it?

Brian: Lady, seven bucks for a used Kenny Loggins record? I'll give you five.
Record Store Customer: Ugh-huh, he autographed it himself.
Brian: All right, I'll give you four.

I've been trying to figure something in my head, and maybe you can help me out, yeah? When a person is insane, as you clearly are, do you know that you're insane? Maybe you're just sitting around, reading "Guns and Ammo", masturbating in your own feces, do you just stop and go, "Wow! It is amazing how fucking crazy I really am!"? Yeah. Do you guys do that?

David Mills

William Wallace: You dropped your rock.
Hamish: It's a test of manhood.
William Wallace: You win.
Hamish: Call it a test of soldiery then. The English won't let us train with weapons, so we train with stones.

Shaun: [hands Liz flowers] Got you these.
Liz: [Liz reads label] "To a wonderful mum"?
Shaun: [sniggers] Oooh! Yeah, that's, because... I thought, it would be, funny, because of what you said last night about me y'know, don't wanna be my mum and that. It's just a little joke, just sort of spur of the moment...
Liz: [long pause] They're for your mum, aren't they?
Shaun: Yeah.
Liz: Smooth.

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