Wayne Campbell: Am I supposed to be a man, am I supposed to say, it's OK, I don't mind. I don't mind. Well I mind! I mind big time? And you know what the worst part is? I NEVER LEARNED TO READ.
Cassandra: Is that true?
Wayne Campbell: Yes, everything except the reading part.

[Evie is drunk]
Evelyn: You're wondering, "What is a place like me doing in a girl like this?"
Rick: Yeah, something like that.

Anybody else's suit riding up on them?


Unless you came in here to wipe my ass, I believe we're through.

Ellis Loew

Good morning, eager young minds.


Deja voodoo.


I'm takin' the dog... dumbass!


How you doin' Chewbacca? Still hanging around with this loser?


Dr. Evil: Talk to the hand, 'cause the face don't wanna hear it anymore.
The President: What hand? Talk to your hand?
Dr. Evil: You ain't all that and a bag of potato chips.
The President: What are you talking about?
Dr. Evil: Don't go there, girlfriend.

If I know Mary as well as I think I do, she'll invite us right in for tea and strumpets.


Oh great! Real Bullets!

Lucky Day

C'mon, Jack, what do you think the Crusades were? A Pope's publicity stunt?


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