Spider-Man: Can I get you a drink.
Mary Jane Watson: I'm with John, he'll get me my drink.
Spider-Man: John...
Mary Jane Watson: By the way, John has seen my show 5 times. Harry has seen it twice. Aunt May has seen it. My sick mother got out of bed to see it. Even my father, he came backstage to borrow cash. But my best friend who cares so much about me, can't make 8 o'clock curtain. After all these years, he's nothing to me but an empty seat.

Indiana: There's a big snake in the plane, Jock.
Jock: Oh, that's just my pet snake, Reggie.
Indiana: I hate snakes, Jock. I hate 'em.
Jock: C'mon, show a little backbone, will ya?

Gubmint do take a bite, don't she?

Payroll Cashier

[to Kelly] Hey, you want some good parental advice? Don't listen to me.

Dr. Ian Malcolm

Isaak: He's a lot shorter than I thought.
Trish: [Laughs] Oh, Daddy.
Isaak: He's just a little guy.

Paul Edgecomb: You let him get past you.
Dean Stanton: No I did not.
Brutus "Brutal" Howell: Three grown men... outsmarted by a mouse.

He ain't all there, is he?

'Dirty Steve' Stevens

I am The Napster.

Lyle

Josh: Hey, James Bond, in America we drive on the right side of the road.
Cher: I am. You try driving in platforms.

Oh, I see, young people in love are never hungry.

Danker

Burma's a warzone.

John J. Rambo

Four turtles, one's fighting a robot samurai. Why not?

Vernon Fenwick

FREE Movie Newsletter