Penny Escher: And I suppose you smoked all these cigarettes?
Karen Eiffel: No, they came pre-smoked.

Girls don't pay - guys pay!

Debbie Dunham

Harlan DeGroat: I want my fucking money, Petty. You hear me, you fucking cunt. Give me my fucking money. I don't give a shit how you get it, give me it. You fucking cunt.
John Petty: Now, will you calm down. I'll get you the money, Harlan. I'm fixin' for a fight this week.
Harlan DeGroat: You've been saying that but you've been fuckin' jerkin' me off. Give me my fucking money, you cunt.

Will: Whoa, where's the rest?
Manager: You never met the quota.
Will: My units are up from last week.
Manager: So's the quota.

[playing with a car] Look out, we're gonna crash!

Megamind

Stomach of the week. Unemployed actor had frankfurter, french fries, alcohol, and sperm. Hell of a last supper, don't you think?

Ray Pinker

That's what you get! Ha Ha! Look at you! Ship's all banged up! Who's the man? Huh? Who's the man? Wait till I get another plane! I'm a line ya friends up right beside you! Where ya at, huh? Where ya at?

Captain Steven Hiller

Our target for this year's purge is hiding in your home. You have one hour to find him and give him to us or we will kill all of you. We will be coming in.

Polite Leader

Not you, fat Jesus.

Officer Franklin

John Chambers: [after hearing of the plan to get the hostages out] So you want to come to Hollywood, act like a big shot...
Tony Mendez: Yeah.
John Chambers: ...without actually doing anything?
Tony Mendez: Yeah.
John Chambers: [smiles] You'll fit right in!

Should I bolt every time I get that feeling in my gut when I meet someone new? Well, I've been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains.

Rob

Mikita's Manager, Glen: Yeah I know what you'd like to do. You'd like to find the guy who did it, rip his still beating heart out of his chest and hold it in front of his face so he can see how black it is before he dies.
Davy: Actually, I was thinking of filing a grievance with the union.
Mikita's Manager, Glen: Well, the world's a twisted place.

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