Wanted for murder, suspect’s name, Bryan Mills.

Dispatch

Cher: "Second notice on an outstanding ticket." I don't remember getting a first notice.
Mel: The TICKET is the first notice.

Heather McNamara: God, they're not gonna expel him. they'll just suspend him for a week or something.
Heather Chandler: He used a real gun, they should throw his ass in jail.
Veronica Sawyer: He used blanks. all he did was ruin 2 pairs of pants, maybe not even that... can you bleach out urine stains?

You sharpshootin' me, punk? Is that what you're doin'? Don't you sharpshoot me! You'll give me forty. Then you're gonna give me forty more. Then you're gonna pull K.P., the grease pit! I'll rub your NOSE in enlisted men's CRUD till you don't know WHICH END IS UP! YOU UNDERSTAND?

Lt. Col. Frank Slade

If people I don't even know look at me and want to fuck me, it means I really have a shot at being a model.

Angela Hayes

Squidward Tentacles: Look at me, I'm a god.
Burger-Beard: Hah!
Squidward Tentacles: What is this diabolical thing?

John McClane: Oh shit.
Zeus: What? WHAT?
John McClane: I left Holly hanging on the phone.
Zeus: Ah, call her back.
John McClane: Uhh, she's going to be pissed.
Zeus: She'll get over it.
John McClane: I don't know, Zeus. Like I said, she's a very stubborn woman.
Zeus: She'd have to be to stay married to you.

Mr. Burgundy. You have a massive erection.

Veronica Corningstone

Riff: Four-and-a-half years I live wit' a buddy an' his family. I think I'm diggin' a guy's character... Boy, I'm a victim of disappointment in you.
Tony: End ya sufferin', little man. Why dontcha just pack up ya gear an' move out?
Riff: 'Cause ya ma's hot fa me...

Toula Portokalos: What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?
Ian Miller: Uh... yeah.
Toula Portokalos: No, really.
Ian Miller: You don't want to know.
Toula Portokalos: Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it.

Dr. Buddy Rydell: I'm going to need you to retard your anger.
Dave Buznik: It's retarded. I'm retarded.

Charles: Perhaps we should've got married.
Henrietta: No! I'd have had to marry your friends, and I'm not sure I could take Fiona.
Charles: Fiona loves you.
Henrietta: Fiona calls me Duckface.
Charles: Well, I never heard that.

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