Armande Voizin: [reading poetry to Luc] It's perfectly wretched, isn't it?
Luc Clairmont: Perfectly.

There are no victims in this classroom.

Louanne

Don't you never say an unkind word about the Time. Me and Silent Bob modeled our whole fucking lives around Morris Day and Jerome. I'm a smooth pimp who loves the pussy. And Tubby here is my black man servant. What.

Jay

Agent 99: Did I hear something?
Maxwell Smart: Yes, there were some tap dancers in the hallway.

We cannot be missing from our children's lives. They are ours to protect.

Reverend Shaw Moore

Roz Focker: How's your sex life?
Dina Byrnes: I can't tell you that!
Roz Focker: I'm a professional. Dina, I'm a sex therapist specializing in senior sexuality.
Dina Byrnes: I knew those weren't yoga mats!
Roz Focker: No.
Dina Byrnes: Well, we're not twenty five... anymore.
Roz Focker: But you're not dead either! Lots of couples our age lack intimacy...
Dina Byrnes: I didn't say we weren't intimate, there are special occasions. Anniversaries and... well, on our anniversary.
Roz Focker: Oy, neesh geete!
Dina Byrnes: What?
Roz Focker: Not good!

Listen, honey. Let me call you right back. Miles and I are in the middle of something. No, it's nothing serious, Miles is just having one of his freak-outs. Yeah. Love you too.

Jack

What are you gonna do with one shoelace? Floss your ass with it.

Miles Logan

I'm going to murder-ball you!

Jonah

You know, I used to want to have a TV ministry. I thought that'd be cool. And now, frankly, all I really want is health insurance.

Cotton Marcus

OK, stop. I feel like I'm watching regional theatre, you guys. God! Am I in the Cleveland Playhouse or something? Your craft is a muscle, you need to exercise it. Take a break; think about what you've done.

Susie

Seems to me you fellows could stand a little less training from the F.B.I. and a little more from the Actor's Studio.

Phillip Vandamm

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