Sally Albright: The first date back is always the toughest, Harry.
Harry Burns: You only had one date. How do you know it's not going to get worse?
Sally Albright: How much worse can it get than finishing dinner, having him reach over, pull a hair out of my head and start flossing with it at the table?
Harry Burns: We're talking dream date compared to my horror.

It's important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. That's why I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination.

Caged Animal Masturbator

Eli Sunday: Oh, Daniel, please... I'm in desperate times. I need a friend... I feel the walls closing in. I've sinned! I need help! I'm a sinner! I've let the Devil grab hold of me in ways I never imagined! I'm so full of sin.
Plainview: The Lord sometimes challenges us, doesn't he?
Eli Sunday: Oh yes he does! Yes he does! Oh! He's completely failed to alert me to the recent panic in our economy and this! I must have this! I've invested... my investments have... Oh, Daniel, I won't bore you, but I... If I could grab the Lord's hands for help I would, but he does these things all the time, these mysteries that he presents and while we wait, while we wait... wait for his word...
Plainview: You're not the chosen brother, Eli. It was Paul who was chosen. He found me and he told me about your land. You're a fraud.
Eli Sunday: Why are you talking about Paul? Don't say this... don't say this to me, Daniel.
Plainview: I did what your brother couldn't. I broke you and I beat you.

Bonasera... Bonasera.

Don Corleone

Earl McGraw: Well, this is definitely the work of professionals. I'd guess-timate Mexican Mafia hit squad. Four, maybe five strong.
Edgar McGraw: How can you tell?
Earl McGraw: Well a sure and steady hand did this. This ain't no squirrelly amateur. This is the work of a salty dog. You can tell by the cleanliness of the carnage. Now a kill-crazy rampage though it may be, all the colors are kept within the lines. If you was a moron, you could almost admire it.

Bill: Sofie, Sofie, my Sofie. I'm so sorry.
Sofie Fatale: Please... please forgive my betrayal.
Bill: No more of that.
Sofie Fatale: But still...
Bill: But still nothing. Nothing, except my aching heart, at what she's done to my beautiful and brilliant Sofie.

Carl Showalter: I'm not gonna debate you, Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard: Okay.
Carl Showalter: I'm not gonna sit here and debate.

Dean Vernon Wormer: Greg, what is the worst fraternity on this campus?
Greg Marmalard: Well that would be hard to say, sir. They're each outstanding in their own way.
Dean Vernon Wormer: Cut the horseshit, son. I've got their disciplinary files right here. Who dropped a whole truckload of fizzies into the swim meet? Who delivered the medical school cadavers to the alumni dinner? Every Halloween, the trees are filled with underwear. Every spring, the toilets explode.
Greg Marmalard: You're talking about Delta, sir.
Dean Vernon Wormer: Of course I'm talking about Delta, you TWERP!

Norma Desmond: My astrologist has read my horoscope, he's read DeMille's horoscope.
Joe Gillis: Has he read the script?

Catwoman: Oh... I would love to live with you in your castle forever... like in a fairy tale...
[Batman caresses the back of her head]
Catwoman: [she claws Batman on the cheek] But I just couldn't live with myself, so don't pretend this is a happy ending!

Jim: World's worst place to get a flat, huh?
Frank: Agreed. I think we better do this quick?

Commander Anderson: Sir, we know why you're out here. God knows, I agree with you. But like you, I swore to defend this country against all enemies, foreign, sir... and domestic. General, we've spilled the same blood in the same mud. And you know god damn well I can't give that order.
Navy SEAL: We're dead!
General Hummel: Your unit is covered from an elevated position, Commander. I'm not gonna ask you again. Don't do anything stupid. No-one has to die here.
Commander Anderson: You men following the General: you're under oath as United States Marines, have you forgotten that? We all have shipmates we remember, some of them were shit on and pissed on by the Pentagon. But that doesn't give you the right to mutiny!
General Hummel: You call it what you want! You're down there, we're up here! You walked into the wrong goddamn room, Commander!

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