cop: You know what happens if you do another turn in the joint?
Hockney: Fuck your father in the shower and then have a snack? Are you going to charge me dickhead?

Reporter: What do you call that collar?
Ringo: A collar.

Dante Hicks: Interesting post script to that story - you know who wound up with Brad in that dark bedroom?
Randal Graves: Your mother?
Dante Hicks: Alan Harris.
Randal Graves: Chess team Alan Harris?
Dante Hicks: The two moved to Idaho shortly after graduation. They raise sheep.
Randal Graves: That's frightening.
Dante Hicks: Takes different strokes to move the world.
Randal Graves: In light of this, I don't see how you can romanticize your relationship with Caitlin. She broke your heart and inadvertently drove men to deviant lifestyles.

Is it better to be feared or respected? And I'd say is it too much to ask for both?

Tony Stark

Germany has declared war on the Jones boys.

Walter Donovan

So I married Bob, for you! I had sex with Bob four times for you! So how can you call me a bad mother?

Cindy

Elsa: Don't look at me like that. We both wanted the Grail. I would have done anything to get it. You would have done the same.
Indiana Jones: I'm sorry you think so.

Ben Grimm: No more cracks about the way I look
Johnny Storm: Hey, call me Mr. Sensitivity.
Johnny Storm: [walking through a crowd] Everybody out of the way! Wide load coming through! He's huge!
Ben Grimm: Hey! Mr. Sensitive!
Johnny Storm: [flies into the sky to make a fiery 4]
Ben Grimm: Showoff!

Hey man, protective vibe, I dig.

Christian

Eddie: They're armed.
Soap: What was that? Armed? What do you mean armed? Armed with what?
Eddie: Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster... what do you think they're gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit!

Ha ha! Drivin' drunk. Classic.

Alan Garner

Kathryn: I wanna FUCK!
Sebastian: And I don't.

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