That's my boy!


The dead know only one thing

Private Joker

Darth Vader: The Emperor has been expecting you.
Luke: I know, father.
Darth Vader: So, you have accepted the truth?
Luke: I have accepted that you were once Anakin Skywalker, my father.
Darth Vader: [angrily] That name no longer has any meaning for me!

There happens to be a lot about me that you don't know, Mr. Smarty Man. There's plenty of joy in my life.

Carolyn Burnham

[singing] There's a bunch of birds in the sky. And some deers just went running by.


There's no reason we need to be shackled by the strictures of the employee-employer relationship. Unless you're into that sort of thing. In which case, I got some shackles in the back. I'm just kidding. But seriously, I've got 'em.

White Goodman

You're not a god. You can take my word for it; this is 12 years of Catholic school talking.


Indiana Jones: You're not from around here, are you?
Agent Irina Spalko: And 'vere' do you think I am from?
Indiana Jones: Well, judging by the way you're sinking your teeth into those 'wubble-yous', I'd say Eastern Ukraine.

Crawford Family Maid: You're shivering, John. Are you cold?
Jim Stark: [Gets up from his seat and takes his jacket off] You want my jacket?

The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of 14 a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking... I highly suggest you try it.

Dr. Evil

Ignorance is bliss, my friend. Don't burden yourself with the secrets of scary people.

Carmine Falcone

Michael Newman: [reading off letter] Like I Said, "Good Guys Need A Break". I know you'll do the right thing this time. Love Morty. P.S. Your Wife's Rockin' Body Still Drives Me Crazy.
Michael Newman: Okay, Morty.
[Throws the universal remote into the bin]

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