The stress is killing me.

Mikey Abromowitz

I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.

Derek Zoolander

There's a really big gap between getting your ass kicked, and having a dancing, singing sprite fool you with trickery, and then strike your throat before you know that you're even in the fight. But I wouldn't expect someone like you to understand that, because all you do is make moves from up in your ivory tower.

Gary

Ethan Hunt: I thought I was going to see Max.
Matthias: You misunderstood. No one sees Max.
Ethan Hunt: Then what am I doing here?
Matthias: Allowing Max to see you, and hear what you've got to say.
Ethan Hunt: I don't communicate very well through a shroud.
Matthias: If Max doesn't like what you have to say, you will be wearing that shroud... indefinitely.

Chicka, chicka, chickabee. / T'ee an me an t'ee an me. / Ressa, ressa, ressa me, / Chicka, chicka, chickabee.

Nell

No, I mean the way he saved her. I mean, I... I could never do anything like that. That was somethin'. The reason people treat me like I'm nothin' is 'cause I'm nothin'.

Johnny

Womack! Why am I not surprised? You piece of shit!

John Mason

Max Fischer: What do you call getting a handjob from Mrs. Calloway in the back of her Jaguar?
Magnus Buchan: A fucking lie.
Max Fischer: You think I got kicked out because of just the aquarium? Nah, it was the handjob. And you know what else? It was worth it.

Do you have life insurance, Phil? Because if you do, you could always use a little more, I mean, who couldn't? But let me tell something - I got's a feeling you ain't got any. Am I right or am I right or am I right?

Ned

Seth: [referring to Evan's mother] I am truly jealous you got to suck on those tits when you were a baby.
Evan: Yeah, well, at least you got to suck on your dad's dick.
Seth: [shrugs] It's a nice lookin' dick.

Boobie's gonna knock 'em out with black Nikes on his feet!

Boobie Miles

You sharpshootin' me, punk? Is that what you're doin'? Don't you sharpshoot me! You'll give me forty. Then you're gonna give me forty more. Then you're gonna pull K.P., the grease pit! I'll rub your NOSE in enlisted men's CRUD till you don't know WHICH END IS UP! YOU UNDERSTAND?

Lt. Col. Frank Slade

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