[opening lyrics] A long ass fucking time ago, in a town called Kickapoo, there lived a humble family religious through and through. But yay, there was a black sheep, And he knew just what to do. His name was young JB and he refused to step in line. A vision he did see of fucking rocking all the time. He wrote a tasty jam and all the planets did align.


Jenny Johnson: [seductively, walking toward him slowly] Matt Saunders, I'm afraid you've been a very evil boy. I think you need to be brought to justice.
Matt Saunders: [with a big grin on his face] Oh, yeah, I have been known to break a few rules here and there.
Jenny Johnson: [still seductive] Total, unequivocal justice.

Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear: Ken? New toys!
Ken: Far out! Down in a jiff, Lotso.
[goes down the elevator]
Ken: So, who's ready for Ken's dream tour?
Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear: Let's show our new friends where they'll be staying!
Ken: Uh, folks, if you'll just want to step right this way...
[he sees Barbie]
Ken: Hi, I'm Ken.
Barbie: Barbie. Have we ever met?
Ken: I would have remembered.
[she laughs]
Ken: Love your leg wamers!
Barbie: Nice ascot!
Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear: Come on, Ken, recess don't last forever.
Ken: Right on, Lotso. This way everybody.
Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear: Got a lot to look forward to, folks. The little ones love new toys.
Buzz Lightyear: What a nice bear!
Rex the Green Dinosaur: And he smells like strawberries.
Woody: Ugh.

This world's a treasure, but it's been telling us to leave for a while now.


Ray: Purgatory's kind of like the in-between one. You weren't really shit, but you weren't all that great either. Like Tottenham. Do you believe in all that stuff, Ken?
Ken: Tottenham?
Ray: The last judgement, and the afterlife, guilt, sins, hell, and all that?
Ken: Um...no.

Cindy: Who's the man Ned?
Ned: Me.
Cindy: Yes. Say it, who's the man?
Ned: Who's the man?

X Games Reporter: Is it true what they say? That he can expand *any* part of his anatomy?
Johnny Storm: Actually, I've always found him to be a little limp.

Indeed. The record shows that Captain Kirk once held the rank of Admiral. And that Admiral Kirk was broken for taking matters into his own hands in defiance of regulations of the law. Do you deny being demoted for these charges? DON'T WAIT FOR THE TRANSLATION. Answer me now.

General Chang

Man on Train: And we'll have that thing off as well, thank you.
Ringo: But...
Man on Train: An elementary knowledge of the Railway Acts would tell you that I'm perfectly within my rights.
Paul: Yeah, but we want to hear it, and there's more of us than you. We're a community, like, a majority vote. Up the workers and all that stuff!
Man on Train: Then I suggest you take that damned thing to the corridor or some other part of the train where you obviously belong.
John: Give us a kiss.

Ed: Do you want your messages?
Shaun: What?
Ed: Well, your mum rang about you going around tomorrow night, and then Liz rang about the two of you eating out tonight, and then your mum rang back to see if I wanted to eat her out tonight.
Shaun: *What*?

If you are a part of that team, then my opinion of Notre Dame football just hit the shits!


Rocco Dillon: Any last words before I throw you off?
Jane Spencer: Yes. Don't do it.

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