I gotta get home for dinner. My wife is slowly poisoning me to death and she gets very angry if I'm late.

Morty

Curt: What is that? [spoken seriously while staring at the lake]
Dana: What?
Curt: In the lake, I swear to god I...
Dana: Yeah, right...
Curt: No seriously. Right there. Don't you see it? There. It looks just like my girlfriend.

Alison Scott: I'm pregnant.
Ben Stone: Fuck off!
Alison Scott: What?
Ben Stone: What?

Elrond: I led Isildur deep into the fires of Mount Doom, the one place it could be destroyed... Isildur kept the Ring. It should have ended that day, but evil was allowed to endure. There's no strength left in the world of Men. They're scattered, divided, leaderless.
Gandalf: There is one who could unite them. One who could reclaim the throne of Gondor.
Elrond: He turned from that path a long time ago. He has chosen exile.

What could possibly have come over Master Luke? Is it something I did? He never expressed any unhappiness with my work.

C-3PO

Neytiri: To become "taronyu", hunter, you must choose your own Ikran and he must also choose you.
Jake Sully: When?
Neytiri: When you are ready.

Charles: That Isaac Newton fellow was right.
Nash: He was on to something.
Charles: Clever boy.

No, no, no, Houston, don't be anxious. Anxiety is bad for the heart.

Shariff

We wearin' Earth Mamma's natural night camo.

Kirk Lazarus

Richard Brewer: We've got a warrant for you, old man.
Buckshot Roberts: I ain't got no business with that war no more, peckerhead son of a bitch. I'm on my own. I've come to pick up the 150 dollars Sheriff Brady has put out for the kid. The rest of you are only worth about 110, but I'll take it. What a sweet disposition. All right, let's dance.

Elaine Dickinson: Would you like something to read?
Hanging Lady: Do you have anything light?
Elaine Dickinson: How about this leaflet, "Famous Jewish Sports Legends?"

Shellie: If you're gonna slug me, just go ahead and get it over with, you sick bastard.
Jack Rafferty: There you go, lying about me again in front of my friends. I have never hit a woman in my life.
[Jackie-Boy hits Shellie in the face]

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