Big Ju: There's too much male bonding in here.
Bertier: Enough!
Big Ju: What is going on here?
Bertier: He kissed me!

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: You're playing with my mind.
Annie Savoy: I'm *trying* to play with your body.
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: I knew it, you're trying to seduce me!
Annie Savoy: Well of course I'm trying to seduce you, for God's sake, and I'm doing a damn poor job of it... Aren't I pretty?
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: God, I think you're real cute.
Annie Savoy: Cute? Baby ducks are cute, I HATE cute! I want to be exotic, and mysterious!
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: You are, you're exotic, and mysterious, and... cute... and... That's why I'd better leave.

Caroline: At least let me buy you lunch. After all, we've only got each other to get through this humiliation.
Christopher: Caroline, the first lunch was a mistake. A second would be complete torture.
Caroline: Drinks, then?

Priest: ...ask yourself if that corpse of a slut is worth dying for.
Marv: Worth dying for.
[shoots priest]
Marv: Worth killing for.
[shoots him again]
Marv: Worth going to hell for.
[shoots him again]
Marv: Amen.

Hutch: Look at all these cops. You really want to eat here?
Starsky: It's a great place. Pop's? Come on. If you're one of the cops you eat at Pop's.

We should have stopped this when Mary got hurt. And definitely when Eleanor... Jesus Christ, we have to get out of here.

Dr. David Marrow

I used to be able to name every nut that there was. And it used to drive my mother crazy, because she used to say, "Harlan Pepper, if you don't stop naming nuts," and the joke was that we lived in Pine Nut, and I think that's what put it in my mind at that point. So she would hear me in the other room, and she'd just start yelling. I'd say, "Peanut. Hazelnut. Cashew nut. Macadamia nut." That was the one that would send her into going crazy. She'd say, "Would you stop naming nuts!" And Hubert used to be able to make the sound, he couldn't talk, but he'd go "rrrawr rrawr" and that sounded like Macadamia nut. Pine nut, which is a nut, but it's also the name of a town. Pistachio nut. Red pistachio nut. Natural, all natural white pistachio nut.

Harlan Pepper

Dee, when your allergies act up, take out your nose ring.


Danny: Thirteen million and you drive this piece of shit cross country to pick me up?
Rusty: Blew it all on the suit.

T.S. Quint: I was going to propose to her.
Brodie: Where?
T.S. Quint: The Universal Tour.
Brodie: You're kidding. What part?
T.S. Quint: When Jaws popped out of the water.
Brodie: That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard.
T.S. Quint: Too bad I'm not trying to marry you.

Agent Paxton: What's status?
Stanley Goodspeed: Status... is, they're dead. They're dead! It's just me and Mason, now he says he's leaving.
Agent Paxton: That is unacceptable, do you hear me? Unacceptable!
Stanley Goodspeed: Well, there's a problem sir, he's got a gun!
Agent Paxton: What do you have, a fuckin' water pistol?

Angelica Bell: What happens when we die?
Virginia Woolf: What happens?
Virginia Woolf: We return to the place that we came from.
Angelica Bell: I don't remember where I came from.
Virginia Woolf: Nor do I.

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