Taggart: I got it! I know how we can run everyone out of Rock Ridge.
Hedley Lamarr: How?
Taggart: We'll kill the first born male child in every household.
Hedley Lamarr: ...Too Jewish.

Something troubles you.

Mirena

Mrs. Beaumont: Are you married?
Fiona: No.
Mrs. Beaumont: Are you a lesbian?
Fiona: Good lord! What makes you ask that?
Mrs. Beaumont: Well, it is one of the possibillites for unmarried girls nowadays, and it's rather more interesting than saying, "Oh dear, never met the right chap," eh?
Fiona: Quite right. Why be dull?
Mrs. Beaumont: Thank you.

Harry Burns: ...Are you finished now?
Sally Albright: ...Yes.
Harry Burns: Can I say something?
Sally Albright: Yes.
Harry Burns: ...I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Cole Trickle: What'd you win this one for?
[Points to a trophy]
Cole Trickle: This one right here, what'd win this for?
Rowdy Burns: Doesn't it say?
Cole Trickle: Yeah, that's a Winston Cup, buddy. Hell, that's an easy one to forget. What's your name, or has that slipped your mind too?
Rowdy Burns: Screw you, man.

Marty DiBergi: You two were at school together?
Nigel Tufnel: We're not university material.
David St. Hubbins: What's that on your finger?
Nigel Tufnel: It's my gum.
David St. Hubbins: What are you doing with it on your finger?
Nigel Tufnel: I might need it later.
David St. Hubbins: Put it on the table, that's terrible.
Nigel Tufnel: No, I might forget it on the table.
David St. Hubbins: [to Marty] Fucking awful, you can't take him anywhere.

I only get carsick on boats.

Joe Buck

A wedding? I love weddings. Drinks all around!

Jack Sparrow

We'll pay for your Viagra but not for your glasses. That way, you get a hard-on but can't see where to put it!

Tom Dobbs

[With tears in her eyes] Well, I think they ought to take the word 'compassion' out of the English dictionary.

Gareth Peirce

Oh my God, is that a gun?

Donatello

Henry 'Razor' Sharp: [to the Kid] Gutsy move, going without a bra!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: [to Razor] Yeah? I got a surprise for you

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