Men... Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.

Leslie

I was taking a piss when I heard the news, congratulations!

Jay

Riley Poole: We have thirty seconds to disable the alarm.
Ben Gates: Go.
[Ben and Riley break into a house and Riley disables the alarm]
Ben Gates: You did that in fifteen seconds.
Riley Poole: That's why I tell people to get a dog.

Kate Kavanagh: You have to admit that he’s ridiculously hot.
Anastasia Steele: If you’re attracted to that sort of human.
Kate Kavanagh: The hot type of human?

[narrating] Baseball may be a religion full of magic, cosmic truth, and the fundamental ontological riddles of our time, but it's also a job.

Annie Savoy

The Golden Army. An unstopable force.

Abe Sapien

Eli: I'm very sorry, Margot.
Margot: It's okay. We're not actually related anyway.
Eli: True.

Marty, you can't go losing your judgment every time someone calls you a name. It's exactly what causes you to get into that accident in the future.

Doc

I can do it with minimal casualties to the indigenous. We'll clear them out with gas first. It'll be humane. More or less.

Col. Quaritch

[heading towards an ox] I need to bite its hide... and wear its stomach like a unitard.

Jeff Portnoy

You gotta hand it to the old girl. I never saw nobody buffalo Bill the way she buffaloed Bill. Bill used to think she was so damn smart. I tried to tell him...”Bill, she's just smart for a blonde."

Budd

[talking about Trish being a grandma] You should fuck her and then have her send you $12 on your birthday.

Cal

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