Jack Twist: Jack Twist.
Ennis Del Mar: Ennis.
Jack Twist: Your folks just stop at Ennis?
Ennis Del Mar: Del Mar.
Jack Twist: Nice to know you, Ennis del Mar.

Everybody ready for a good time?


Sarah Marshall: I need you to get hard, Pete.
Peter Bretter: I know what I'm supposed to do.

Michael Newman: My schmeckel got bigger now that I'm older, just so you guys know that.
Trudy: It couldn't have gotten any smaller.
Ted: [Laughing] It looked like a litttle Tic Tac.
Michael Newman: Yeah, come, here, I'll freshen your breath.

Lambeau: Yeah, you were smarter than me then, and you're smarter than me now. So, don't blame me for how your life turned out.
Sean: I don't blame you! It's not about you, you mathematical dick! It's about the boy! He's a good kid! And I won't see you fuck him up like you're trying to fuck up me right now! I won't let you make feel like a failure too!

They fuck you and fuck you and fuck you, and just when you think it's over, that's when the real fucking begins!


You know, I was having lunch with some guys from NBC, so I said, 'Did you eat yet or what?' And Tom Christie said, 'No, JEW?' Not 'Did you?'...JEW eat? JEW? You get it? JEW eat?

Alvy Singer

Gianni: But nice try, I'm impressed. Took more than a driver to figure this out.
Frank Martin: I haven't figured it all out yet.
Gianni: Perhaps I can help you! What part are you a little... how you say, "thick" on?
Frank Martin: You. Why?
Gianni: Oh well, that's the easy part. It's a business deal, pure and simple. I'm for hire to he highest bidder. And in this case, the highest bidders were the Colombian cocaine cartels that wanted these pesky lawmen off their backs.

Will: No, not a lick. I mean, I look at a piano, I see a bunch of keys, three pedals, and a box of wood. But Beethoven, Mozart, they saw it, they could just play. I couldn't paint you a picture, I probably can't hit the ball out of Fenway, and I can't play the piano.
Skylar: But you can do my o-chem paper in under an hour.
Will: Right. Well, I mean when it came to stuff like that... I could always just play.

Indecisive Video Customer: Well, what about these two?
Randal Graves: Oh, they suck.
Indecisive Video Customer: These are the same two movies! You weren't paying any attention!
Randal Graves: No, I wasn't.
Indecisive Video Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...
Randal Graves: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here.
Randal Graves: You'll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!

Nicky: He was trying to sell out a mole or something, but you got to him first.
Jason Bourne: [surprised] I killed him?

Princess Isabelle: I've come to beg for the life of William Wallace.
Prince Edward: [scoffs] You're quite taken with him, aren't you?

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