William Shakespeare: Follow that boat!
First Boatman: Right you are, guv'nor!... I know your face. Are you an actor?
William Shakespeare: [oh God, here we go again] Yes.
First Boatman: Yes, I've seen you in something. That one about a king.
William Shakespeare: Really?
First Boatman: I had that Christopher Marlowe in my boat once.

I wish He had chosen an instrument more wieldy than the House of Representatives.

Abraham Lincoln

Carter Duryea: [Carter and Alex meet in an elevator] 47. Are you going to Sports America offices?
Alex Foreman: Yeah.
Carter Duryea: You an intern or something?
Alex Foreman: Uh, no, my dad works there.
Carter Duryea: Oh.
Alex Foreman: Are you interning there?
Carter Duryea: No, I'm starting a job there today.
Alex Foreman: That's good. Congratulations.
Carter Duryea: Oh, thank you. I'm totally scared shitless. I have no idea what I'm doing. Don't tell anyone, okay?
Alex Foreman: Okay.

[praying] Tomorrow we goes into battle, so Lordy, let me fight with the rifle in one hand, and the Good Book in the other. So that if I may die at the muzzle of the rifle... die on water, or on land, I may know that you blessed Jesus almighty are with me... and I have no fear.

Jupiter Sharts

Did you know a young boy drowned the year before those two others were killed? The counselors weren't paying any attention... They were making love while that young boy drowned. His name was Jason. I was working the day that it happened. Preparing meals... here. I was the cook. Jason should've been watched. Every minute. He was - he wasn't a very good swimmer. We can go now, dear.

Pamela Voorhees

Let me put it this way. My horse is definitely not my best friend.

Roy O'Bannon

[removes helmet and turns around to face Commodus] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

Maximus

Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Cornell, Switzerland... he was thrown out of a lot of colleges.

Bernstein

Sam Wilson: How do we tell the good guys from the bad guys?
Steve Rogers: If they're shooting at you, they're bad!

I want to have a threesome.

Daphne Binks

Billy Costigan: Listen, listen. I got like, like thirty thousand bucks, right? Insurance money. You know, after my mother passed and everything?
Cousin Sean: Yeah, yeah.
Billy Costigan: In your line of work, if I gave you like what, ten thousand, what could I get back?
Cousin Sean: You know... you know what you usually say at these moments?
Billy Costigan: What? What?
Cousin Sean: C'mon, man.
Billy Costigan: Aw, come on, you fucking moron. Come on. What, you want me to say it? Huh? I'm not a cop, alright? I'm your fucking cousin.
Cousin Sean: Yeah, you're bad! You corrupt fuck, man! You must be my cousin.

Bellatrix Lestrange: Do it!
Fenrir Greyback: He doesn't have the stomach, like his father. Let me finish him in my own way.
Bellatrix Lestrange: No! The Dark Lord was clear, the boy's to do it.

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