As you know this puts us in awkward position... I don't have enough to continue.

Eddie

Toula Portokalos: [narrating] My dad believed in two things: That Greeks should educate non Greeks about being Greek and every ailment from psoriasis to poison ivy can be cured with Windex.

A woman is said to be worth her weight in hens. And a man's wealth is measured by the size of his cock.

Armand

Jack: Come on. I love you.
Marcie: But what about Ned?
Jack: I don't love Ned.

Party Guest: Oh,but really biting satire is always better than physical force.
Isaac Davis: No,physical force is always better with Nazis.

Billy Kostecki: [Watching Penny and Johnny dance] You'd think they were a couple
Baby: Well aren't they?
Billy Kostecki: Naw, not since we were kids.

Augustus Waters: What's your name?
Hazel Grace Lancaster: Hazel
Augustus Waters: No, your full name
Hazel Grace Lancaster: Hazel Grace Lancaster

Jack Horner: Do these characters have a name?
Dirk: The guy's name is Brock Landers.
Reed Rothchild: And his partner is Chest Rockwell.
Jack Horner: Those are some great names.

Alex: [trying to start the car] Come on, come on!
[Johnathan turns the key and breaks it off]
Alex: You broke it, you broke it, you broke it!
Jonathan: Be quiet Alex! If there's going to be any hysterics, they'll come from me!

No you're not hardcore! Unless you live hardcore! And the legend of the rent was way hardcore!

Dewey Finn

One time, I was at this party... and I was sitting on the couch with Amanda McKinney. She was just sitting there, looking beautiful. So, I lean in to kiss her, and I realize I have gum in my mouth. So, I turn to spit it out and put it in a paper cup. I turn back, and Amanda McKinney throws up all over herself. I knew the moment it happened, it was a miracle. I could have been kissing her when she threw up. It would have scarred me for life. I may never have recovered.

Merrill

[Joe is reading Norma's script] Sometimes it's interesting to see just how bad bad writing can be. This promised to go the limit.

Joe Gillis

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