Frodo: Who is she? This woman you sing of?
Aragorn: 'Tis the Lay of Lúthien. The Elf-maiden who gave her love to Beren, a mortal.
Frodo: What happened to her?
Aragorn: She died.
[He sighs.]
Aragorn: Get some sleep, Frodo.

Girl: Can you sign a copy of your book for me. I got it on ebay.
Uncle Ben: They sell my shit on ebay?
Guy: You wrote a book?
Uncle Ben: Yeah, that was back when I was drinking.

[to white fan] Stay black!

Three G's

Claudia Wilson Gator: I wanted to do that.
Jim Kurring: Well...
Claudia Wilson Gator: That felt good to do - to do what I wanted to do.

General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, have you ever seen a Commie drink a glass of water?Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Well, no, I can't say I have.

Honey Horne: I bet you like to be in control...
Garth: Yes, like when I was 17, my sister wanted to loan my Def Leppard. I said "No way!".

Incoming reports show this year's Purge has been the most succesful to date, with the most murders committed.

Newscaster

Gale: Jesus, the camera, hurry!
Kenny: My name isn't Jesus.

No, my webs were no miracle, Wilbur. I was only describing what I saw. The miracle is you.

Charlotte A. Cavatica

Harry, the clock on that nine-foot nuclear weapon is ticking.

Chick

Edwin: Excuse me, I'm - just what the hell is going on here?
Royce: We're being hunted. The cages, soldier, all of us. We were all brought here for the same purpose. This planet is a game preserve, and we're the game. In case you didn't notice, we just got flushed out. They sent the dogs in. Just like you would if you were stalking boar, shooting quail. They split us apart and they watched. Testing us.
Isabelle: How do you know this?
Royce: Because, that's what I would do.

Hitchhiker: Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see 8-Minute Abs sittin' there, there's 7-Minute Abs right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man?
Ted: I would go for the 7.
Hitchhiker: Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folk.
Ted: You guarantee it? That's - how do you do that?
Hitchhiker: If you're not happy with the first 7 minutes, we're gonna send you the extra minute free. You see? That's it. That's our motto. That's where we're comin' from. That's from "A" to "B".
Ted: That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 6-Minute Abs. Then you're in trouble, huh?

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