Even though some of you are pretty thin, you all have fat hearts, and that's what matters.

Fat Amy

Jay: What are you trying to say? Just say it already.
Silent Bob: THE SIGN on the back of the car said "Critters Of HOLLYWOOD," YOU DUMB FUCK!
Jay: Say it, don't spray it.

Marty DiBergi: Now, during the Flower People period, who was your drummer?
David St. Hubbins: Stumpy's replacement, Peter James Bond. He also died in mysterious circumstances. We were playing a, uh...
Nigel Tufnel: ...Festival.
David St. Hubbins: Jazz blues festival. Where was that?
Nigel Tufnel: Blues jazz, really.
Derek Smalls: Blues jazz festival. Misnamed.
Nigel Tufnel: It was in the Isle of, uh...
David St. Hubbins: Isle of Lucy. The Isle of Lucy jazz and blues festival.
Nigel Tufnel: And, uh, it was tragic, really. He exploded on stage.
Derek Smalls: Just like that.
David St. Hubbins: He just went up.
Nigel Tufnel: He just was like a flash of green light... And that was it. Nothing was left.
David St. Hubbins: Look at his face.
Nigel Tufnel: Well, there was...
David St. Hubbins: It's true, this really did happen.
Nigel Tufnel: It's true. There was a little green globule on his drum seat.
David St. Hubbins: Like a stain, really.
Nigel Tufnel: It was more of a stain than a globule, actually.

Leprechaun: Are you Holly Kennedy?
Holly Kennedy: If I am will you sing at me?
Leprechaun: Yes.
Holly Kennedy: No, I'm not.
Leprechaun: I could get reported!
Holly Kennedy

Popeye. You still picking your feet in Poughkeepsie?

Walt Simonson

Sydney Ellen Wade: Hello?
President Andrew Shepherd: Yeah, hi, is this Sydney?
Sydney Ellen Wade: Leo?
President Andrew Shepherd: No, this is Andrew Shepherd.
Sydney Ellen Wade: Oh! It's Andrew Shepherd! Yeah, you're hilarious, Richard, you're just a regular riot!
President Andrew Shepherd: No, this isn't Richard, this is Andrew Shepherd.
Sydney Ellen Wade: Oh! Well, I'm so glad you called, because I forgot to tell you today what a nice ass you have. I'm also impressed that you were able to get my phone number given the fact that I don't have a phone. Good night, Richard.
President Andrew Shepherd: Uh, this isn't Richard-
[Sydney hangs up]
President Andrew Shepherd: This used to be easier.

Oh... guys? Don't stay in here all day. I had to take the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector; it was beeping all night.


[Grace is showing pictures of the Na'vi to Jake so he remembers them]
Dr. Grace Augustine: Okay, let's run through them again.
Jake Sully: [Sees a picture] Mo'at. The Dragon lady.
[Sees next picture]
Jake Sully: Eytukan.
Dr. Grace Augustine: [Says the name correctly] Eytukan. He's the clan leader. But she's the spiritual leader. Like a chaman.
Jake Sully: Got it.
[Sees next picture]
Jake Sully: Tsu'tey
Dr. Grace Augustine: [Says the name correctly] Tsu'tey.
Jake Sully: Tsu'tey.
Dr. Grace Augustine: He'll be the next clan leader.
Jake Sully: [Sees next picture] Neytiri.
Dr. Grace Augustine: She'll be the next "Tsahik". They'll become a mated pair.
Jake Sully: So who's this Eywa?
Norm Spellman: Who's Eywa? Only their deity! Their goddess, maker of all living things. Everything they know! You'd know this if you've had any training whatsoever.
Jake Sully: [Shows him Neytiri's picture] Who's got a date with the chief's daughter?
Norm Spellman: Oh, come on!

Barry: Rob, top five musical crimes perpetuated by Stevie Wonder in the '80s and '90s. Go. Sub-question: is it in fact unfair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter day sins, is it better to burn out or fade away?

Tommy: [in front of fan] La-la-la-loo-loo... Luuuke... Luuuke! I am your fah-ther! La-la-lay-lu...
Richard Hayden: Oh, I've interrupted happy time! Now I know you want to sit there and keep being not slim, but we gotta work a little today.
Tommy: That was from Star Wars.
Richard Hayden: I know.

Keith Frazier: Last time I had my johnson pulled this good it cost me five bucks.
Captain John Darius: Five bucks?
Keith Frazier: It was Tiajuana. Don't ask.

This not as is to see as seeing is to not having seen anything at all.


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