When I was growing up, if we wanted a Jacuzzi, we had to fart in the tub.

Billy Ray

Okay you can do this. You are confident woman who can deal with conflict. I'm going to pass out. Just get out there, tell them your decision. They're rational. They may even become friends. They'll probably just shake hands....

Lauren

John McClane: Drop it, dickhead. It's the police.
Tony: You're not going to hurt me.
John McClane: Oh, yeah? Why not?
Tony: Because you're a policeman. There are rules for policemen.
John McClane: Yeah. That's what my captain keeps telling me.

[facing a storm on the lifeboat] Richard Parker, come out you have to see this! It's beautiful!

Pi Patel

Dana: I'm so sorry I almost shot you. I probably wouldn't have.
Marty: Hey, shush, no. I totally get it. I'm sorry I let you get attacked by a werewolf and then ended the world.

Alright, I want his face all over this windshield.

Robert

Kids these days. They just don't get scared like they used to.

Henry J. Waternoose

Mae: Mom, why do you always wear the high tops?
Daphne Wilder: I just got these, what's wrong with these?
Maggie: There just kinda depressing.
Milly: Mom for your 60th birthday we'll buy you something beautiful, something that grandma Moses would not wear.

It is obvious that this contest cannot be decided by our knowledge of the Force... but by our skills with the lightsaber.

Count Dooku

It may not be my way, but damn if there doesn't go one happy family. All right, gang, let's just shoot some tear gas into the diner, and then when the guys come out with the monkey, we'll... Fuckbeans. That was them, wasn't it?

Whillenholly

Ages three and up! It's on my box! Ages three and up! I'm not supposed to be babysitting Princess Drool!

Mr. Potato Head

Delbert Grady: I feel you will have to deal with this matter in the harshest possible way, Mr. Torrance.
Jack Torrance: There's nothing I look forward to with greater pleasure, Mr. Grady.

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