Homer Simpson: Okay, son. You have only one chance to throw that bomb through the hole.
Bart Simpson: Dad, in case I don't make it, I'm sorry I said I wish you weren't my dad.
Homer Simpson: I don't blame you, son. I've never been that good of a father. Maybe it all starts with the way my father raised me. Yes, it's all clear to me. It's all just been one long, unbroken chain of...
Marge Simpson: Somebody throw the goddamn bomb!

Dwayne, you've gotta learn to kick ass if you wanna be a peacemaker.

Sheriff

Billy Hoyle: You are so stupid. It would take your mother 1, no, 2 hours to watch 60 MINUTES.
Sidney Deane: Don't start that shit again.

Louise: Remember when we first met?
Jimmy: Yeah.
Louise: What happened? Tell me what you said.
Jimmy: I said you had a nice pair of eyes.
Louise: And what did I say? You remember?
Jimmy: Yeah, you shut 'em. Asked me if I knew what color they were?
Louise: And what's you say?
Jimmy: I didn't know.
Louise: Jimmy, what color are my eyes?
Jimmy: They're brown.

Alyssa: And while I was falling for you I put a ceiling on that, because you werfe a guy. Until I remembered why I opened the door to women in the first place: to not limit the likelihood of finding one person who'd complement me so completely. So here we are. I was thorough when I looked for you. And I feel justified lying in your arms, 'cause I got here on my own terms, and I have no question there was some place I didn't look. And for me that makes all the difference.

Phil Wenneck: Stu, we don't have time for this. Look, let's go hook up with Doug, and we'll deal with the baby later.
Stu Price: Phil, we're not gonna leave a baby in the room, there's a fucking tiger in the bathroom!
Phil Wenneck: It's not our baby.
Alan Garner: Yeah, I gotta side with Stu on this one.

Next time, Indiana Jones, it will take more than children to save you.

Belloq

Quit smiling, you're suppose to be professional.

Rocket Raccoon

Keys: Elliot thinks his thoughts?
Michael: No... Elliot... Elliot feels his feelings.

Evian is naive spelled backward.

Vickie

Rocky: Hey, yo, Mike, whose lock is this? Whose stuff is this in my locker?
Mike: It's Dipper's stuff. It ain't your locker no more.
Rocky: Whatta ya talkin' about it ain't my locker no more? It's been my locker for six years. Where's my gear?
Mike: Mickey told me to bag it. Hang it.
Rocky: You put my stuff on skid row? I been in that locker six years; you put my stuff in a bag on skid row?
Mike: Mickey tells me what to do. I gotta do it, right, Rock?
Rocky: Where is he?
Mike: Working with Dipper. He's in a baaad mood.
Rocky: So am I.

Yvaine: [in the pirate ship] Tell me about Victoria.
Tristan: Well, she... she... There's nothing else to tell you.
Yvaine: The little I know about love is that it's unconditional. It's not something you can buy.
Tristan: Hang on! This wasn't about me trying to buy her love. This was to prove to her how I felt.
Yvaine: Ah... And what's she doing to prove how she feels about you?
Tristan: Well... Look, Yvaine, you'll understand when you meet her, all right? If we don't get murdered by pirates first.
Yvaine: Mmm... Murdered by pirates, heart torn out and eaten, meet Victoria... I can't quite decide which sounds more fun...

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