Donny: How did you get this car?
Freb: Actually, the keys were in it.
Donny: Well, that kinda defies the point.
Memphis: You stole a car that wasn't on the list. Why don't you just go to the police station in a red clown suit and let everybody know what we're doing here?

Gru: [reading to the girls from a pop-up book] "Three little kittens started to yawn..."
Agnes: You're making them drink the milk!
Gru: Wow, this is garbage! You actually like this?

Griffin: You can't just keep following me.
Davey: Actually, I'm the only one who *can* keep following you.

Korben Dallas: [shoves a bag into Ruby's hands] You guard this with your life, or you're gonna look like this guy here! You green?
DJ Ruby Rhod: G-green.
[cut to the President's office, where every word is being heard over the radio, transmitted galaxy-wide on Ruby's radio show]
Korben Dallas: Super green?
DJ Ruby Rhod: Super green.
President Lindberg: Is that your idea of a discreet operation?
General Munro: Don't-don't worry, sir. I know my man. He'll calm things down.
[cut back to Fhloston, as three Mangalores go down in an explosion of gunfire, and Korben charges out a door, guns blazing]

Can you believe my f-ing mom is here?


Shaun: It's not that I don't wanna spend time with you, cause I do. It's just... Ed doesn't have too many friends.
Ed: Can I get... any of you cunts... a drink?

I spilled wasabi on me, one time!


[narrating] Walt Whitman once said, "I see great things in baseball. It's our game, the American game. It will repair our losses and be a blessing to us." You could look it up.

Annie Savoy

Do you have life insurance, Phil? Because if you do, you could always use a little more, I mean, who couldn't? But let me tell something - I got's a feeling you ain't got any. Am I right or am I right or am I right?


Son of a bitch ball. Why can't you go home? Aren't you good enough for your home? ANSWER ME! Suck my white ass ball!

Happy Gilmore

Edith: It's against the law to be married to two people at the same time!
Dewey Cox: What about if, if you're famous?

Dewey Cox: [singing] In my dreams, you're blowing me... some kisses.
Darlene: [singing] That's one of my favorite things to do.

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