Chazz Michael Michaels Quotes
Chazz: Are you an official here? 'Cause you've officially given me a boner.
Chazz: I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bare.
Chazz: Personal philosophy: Clothing optional.
Coach: What do you guys have that all other teams don't have?
Chazz: Twin dongs?
How'd it go with your lady? Carve up any ice... With your weiner?
Chazz: Night is a very dark time for me.
Jimmy: It's dark for everyone, idiot!
Chazz: Not for people who live in Alaska. Or people with night-vision goggles.
I swear to god if you cut my head off...
You better not cut my head off!
Jimmy: So Coach, I was thinking about the music for our routine.
Chazz: We're going to skate to one song, and one song [sings] I'm gonna get you get you drunk, get you drunk off my lady humps. My humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps.
Jimmy: How do you even know what that means?
Chazz: No one knows what it means, but it's provocative.
Jimmy: No it's not, it's...
Chazz: It gets the people GOING!