Prince Humperdinck: Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work. But I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder, and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped.
Count Rugen: Get some rest. If you haven't got your health, then you haven't got anything.

Count Rugen: Your princess is quite a winning creature. A trifle simple, perhaps. Her appeal is undeniable.
Prince Humperdinck: I know, the people are quite taken with her. It's odd, but when I hired Vizzini to have her murdered on our engagement day, I thought that was clever. But it's going to be so much more moving when I strangle her on our wedding night. Once Guilder is blamed, the nation will truly be outraged... they'll demand we go to war!

Count Rugen: As you know, the concept of the suction pump is centuries old. Really that's all this is except that instead of sucking water, I'm sucking life. I've just sucked one year of your life away. I might one day go as high as five, but I really don't know what that would do to you. So, let's just start with what we have. What did this do to you? Tell me. And remember, this is for posterity so... be honest. How do you feel?
Westley: [moans in pain]
Count Rugen: Interesting...

[admiring his torture contraption] Beautiful isn't it? It took me half a lifetime to invent it. I'm sure by now you've discovered my deep and abiding interest in pain. Presently I'm writing the definitive work on the subject, so I want you to be totally honest with me on how the machine makes you feel. This being our first try, I'll use the lowest setting.

Westley: We are men of action, lies do not become us.
Count Rugen: Well spoken, sir.
Westley: [stares]
Count Rugen: What is it?
Westley: You have six fingers on your right hand. Someone was looking for-
Count Rugen: [knocks him out]

Inigo Montoya: Offer me money!
Count Rugen: Yes.
Inigo Montoya: Power too, promise me that!
Count Rugen: All that I have and more. Please.
Inigo Montoya: Offer me everything I ask for.
Count Rugen: Anything you want.
Inigo Montoya: I want my father back you son of a bitch.

My. You've got an overdeveloped sense of vengeance. It's going to get you into trouble someday.

Good heavens. Are you still trying to win?

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