Greg Focker Quotes
Jack Byrnes: Are you still physically attracted to my daughter, Greg?
Greg Focker: Pam? Are you kidding... yes, yes Jack, there's never been a problem with that.
Jack Byrnes: Even after her body has endured the hellish ordeal of birthing twins?
Greg Focker: Yes, even after that, it's all good, it's all good under the hood.
Jack Byrnes: That's disgusting.
Prudence (Laura Dern): You see like a wonderful couple.
Jack Byrnes: No, no, no, we're not homosexual.
Greg Focker: Yeah, no.
Jack Brynes: No, no, no, this is my son in law.
Prudence: Oh...
Greg Focker: Yeah no. However, if you're looking to fill a quota, we can be flexible.
Prudence: Okay, that's an interesting joke but I appreciate levity in a moment of misunderstanding so thank you Greg.
Greg, are you prepared to be... the Godfocker?
Jack Byrnes
Jack Byrnes: I like few minutes alone with him just to erase what he saw from his memory.
Greg Focker: No, you're not gonna erase my son's memory.
Greg Focker: Hey whats the good word grandpa Jack?
Jack Byrnes: This is Jack Byrnes
Greg Focker: Yeah I know, I can tell from the caller ID.
I have eyes too, so I'll be watching you... watching me.
Greg Focker: [high on Truth Serum, giving a speech] Hello everybody. I am, uh, about to set sail on my ship... on the sea of life with my first mate - the beautiful Pamela Byrnes.
Pam Byrnes: Love you, baby!
[blows kiss]
Greg Focker: [drunkenly blows back kiss, pauses] I still masturbate to Pam. What? She's hot - check out those boobs. I just wanna lather 'em up with soap and rub my face in 'em. I could take a vacation in there. What? Gosh, sorry you're perfect! And there's another wonderful lady in the audience, my future mother-in-law Dina Byrnes! Dina-Dina-Bo-Bina-I-love-Dina! Byrnes! You know they say you can tell from looking at the mother what your wife will look like in the future - well, I'm looking, and I'm LIKIN...
[Spies Jorge]
Greg Focker: In my first... passionate sexual awakening, I made sweet sweet love to my housekeeper, Isabelle.
Pam Byrnes: Come on, honey, that was in the past, so sit down.
Greg Focker: No no no, baby - I gotta get this off my chest.
Pam Byrnes: Please... sit.
Greg Focker: We conceived a child. Come on up here, Jorge! This is the fruit of my loins. Come on - search your heart, you know it to be true. Yo soy tu papa! Yeah, I know, a lot of information to take in. Give that boy a hand. Oh, and Jack - Pam's pregnant. Focker out.
[passes out]
Bernie Focker: Do you want me to be macho wacho?
Greg Focker: Dad, have I ever said the words macho wacho to you?
Greg Focker: What's the sign for sour milk, 'cause this tastes a little... funky.
Jack Byrnes: That's because that's from Debbie's left breast, Greg.
Pam Byrnes: Did you tell your mother that I'm pregnant? Because she keeps touching my stomach and smiling like that.
Greg Focker: No, I didn't tell her. She guessed.
Pam Byrnes: She what?
Greg Focker: Yeah, and then she told my dad.
Pam Byrnes: Oh, my God.
Greg Focker: Hey, Dad, you shouldn't take Moses into the RV. Jack and Dina have a cat.
Bernie Focker: Oh, Moses is fine. He's perfectly trained.
Greg Focker: Dad, he humps everything that moves.
Roz Focker: [Laughing] He's like your father!
Bernie Focker: I never cheated on you!
Greg Focker: You meet some of the... eh... some of the cousins?
Jack Byrnes: I met some, yes. I met some... Dom?
Greg Focker: Yeah, Dom Focker, that's my dad's... uh... first cousin. You meet his kids, Randy and Orny?
Greg Focker
Gaylord "Greg" Focker is a male nurse who lives in Chicago. Greg actually aced the MCATs but chose nursing over being a doctor because he felt he could better help people as a nurse.
In Meet the Parents, poor Greg is desperately trying to impress Pam's parents so that he may ask her father, Jack, for his daughter's hand in marriage. Everything that can go wrong for Greg does.
In Meet the Fockers, Greg is introducing the Byrnes to his incredibly embarrassing parents, Bernie and Roz Focker.
- Played By
- Ben Stiller
- Full Name
- Greg Focker
