[voice over narration] At the very edge of the horizon we could make out the gas fires of the refineries at Missoula, while to the south we could see the lights of Cheyenne, a city bigger and grander than I'd ever seen.

[voice over narration] They hadn't found but one set of bones in the ashes of the house so we knew they'd be looking for us. Kit made sure we'd be prepared. He gave me lectures on how a gun works, how to take it apart, and put it back together again, in case I had to carry on without him. He said that if the devil came at me, I'd shoot him with a gun. One day I carried thirty pounds of wood a distance of file miles. Another day while hiding in the forest I covered my eyes with make up to see how they'd come out.

[voice over narration] We hid out in the wilderness down by a river in the grove of Cotton Woods. Being the flood season we built our house in the trees.

[voice over narration] We planned a huge network of tunnels under the forrest floor, and our first order of business every morning was to decide on a new pathway for the day.

[voice over narration] Then sure enough Dad found out I been running around behind his back. He was madder than I ever seen him. His punishment for deceiving him

[voice over narration] Of course I had to keep all of this a secret from my Dad. He would had a fit because Kit was ten years older than me and came from the wrong side of the tracks so called.

[voice over narration] Little did I realise that what began in the alleys and back ways of this quiet town would end in the Badlands of Montana.

[voice over narration] My Mother dies of pneumonia when I was just a kid. My Father kept their wedding cake int he freezer for ten whole years. After the funeral he gave it to the yard man. He tried to act cheerful but he could never be consoled by the little stranger he found in his house. Then one day hoping to begin a new life away from the scene of all these memories he moved us from Texas to Port Dupree, South Dakota.

He needed me now more than ever, but something had come between us. I'd stopped even paying attention to him. Instead I sat in the car and read a map and spelled out entire sentences with my tongue on the roof of mouth where nobody could read them.

One day, while taking a look at some vistas in Dad's stereopticon, it hit me that I was just this little girl, born in Texas, whose father was a sign painter, who only had just so many years to live. It sent a chill down my spine and I thought where would I be this very moment, if Kit had never met me? Or killed anybody... this very moment... if my mom had never met my dad... if she had never died. And what's the man I'll marry gonna look like? What's he doing right this minute? Is he thinking about me now, by some coincidence, even though he doesn't know me? Does it show on his face? For days afterwards I lived in dread. Sometimes I wished I could fall asleep and be taken off to some magical land, and this never happened.

At this moment, I didn't feel shame or fear, but just kind of blah, like when you're sitting there and all the water's run out of the bathtub.

Kit Carruthers: You Tired?
Holly Sargis: Yeah.
Kit Carruthers: Yeah, you look tired... Listen, honey. when all this is over, I'm going to sit down and buy you a big, thick steak.
Holly Sargis: I don't want a steak.
Kit Carruthers: Well, we'll see about that... Hey, lookie.

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Holly Sargis

Played By
Sissy Spacek
Full Name
Holly Sargis