No refunds, consider your refund escaping this death trap with your lives!

Jackie Moon: In the anals of history people are going to be talking about three things: the discovery of fire, invention of the submarine, and the Flint, Michigan Mega Bowl.

ELE! Everybody love everybody!

Suck my cock! I'll kill your family!

Damnit, Vakidis! Learn fucking English!

Jackie Moon: There'll be a lotta television cameras out there so we just gotta be tip top.
Clarence 'Coffee' Black: So what's the plan?
Jackie Moon: Brought a secret weapon. It's going to make us look extra cool on Tv.
Bee Bee Ellis: What the hell is that?
Jackie Moon: It's eyeliner dummy. Now who's first? Monix?
Monix: Oh yeah... Let me get a fresh Maxi-Pad outta my purse.

If you see an opposum, kill it. It’s not a pet.

It feels like I got cat piss in my eyes.

Cover your sodas! Dewey loves sugar!

It's like the Titanic but with bears!

Dick Pepperfield: I am here with owner/player/coach, Jackie Moon, and two of the Flint Tropics Ball girls. Hello ladies.
Jackie Moon: You are a little tongue tied now aren't ya Dick?
Dick Pepperfield: *Laughing* No no no, no no no. Mrs. Pepperfield is watching this, she watches all the broadcasts, and I just want you to know that I have no interest in these ladies what-so-ever. I think they are appalling.

I am great at free throws. Seriously, free throws are, like, my best thing.

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Jackie Moon

Semi Pro Photo

Jackie Moon is the star character of Semi-Pro. As the player/owner of the Flint Tropics, Moon is at the center of anything involving the franchise. He wrestlers bears for publicity and will do pretty much anything to keep the squad afloat. Not nearly as great a player as he thinks he is.

Played By
Will Ferrell
Full Name
Jackie Moon