Jake: Disco pants and haircuts...
Elwood: Yeah, lots of space in this mall.

Jake: What are we doing here?
Elwood: You promised you'd visit the penguin the day you got out.
Jake: Yeah? So I lied to her.
Elwood: You can't lie to a nun. We got to go in and visit the penguin.
Jake: No... fucking... way.

Elwood: We'll be all right if we can just get back on the expressway.
Jake: This don't look like no expressway to me, pal.
Elwood: Don't yell at me.
Jake: Well whadda you want me to do, Motorhead?
Elwood: Why da ya gotta be so negative all the time? Why can't ya offer some... constructive criticism?
Jake: You got us into to this parking lot, pal, so YOU get us out.
Elwood: You want outta this parking lot?... O.K.

Jake: My name is Jacob Stein. I'm from the American Federation of Music. I've been sent to see if you gentlemen are carrying your permits.
Tucker McElroy: Our what?
Jake: Your union cards. May I see your cards please?
Tucker McElroy: Well, suppose we ain't got no union cards and go in there and start playin' anyway? Whatcha gonna do about that? You gonna stop us, Stein? Ha. You're gonna look pretty funny tryin' to eat corn on the cob with no fuckin' teeth!

Jake: If you say no, Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch, and dinner... every day of the week.
Mr. Fabulous: Okay, okay. You got me. I'll play.

Jake: Look at you, in those candy-assed monkey suits.
Willie 'Too Big' Hall: At least we got a change of clothes. You're wearing the same shit you had on three years ago.

Jake: $2,000 for this chunk of shit?
Murph: I mean, honestly Ray. It's used, there's no action left in this keyboard.
Ray: I don't think there's anything wrong with the action on this keyboard.

Me and Elwood are gonna make a break for it. Take $1,400 and give it to Ray's Music Exchange in Calumet City. Give the rest to the band.

Elwood: I'm gonna quit work first thing in the morning.
Jake: And how are you gonna get to work, Mr. Lead Foot, Mr. Hot Rod, Mr Motor Head? Those cops took your license away. They got your name, your address.
Elwood: No they don't got my address. I falsified my renewal. I put 1060 West Addison.
Jake: 1060 West Addison? That's Wrigley Field.

Jake: Uh, Bob, about the money for tonight.
Bob: Oh, yeah... That's $200, and you boys drank $300 worth of beer.

That Night Train's a mean wine.

Jake: Maury, we need $5,000 fast.
Maury Sline: $5,000? Who do you guys think you are, The Beatles?

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