Max Fischer Quotes
Max Fischer: How the hell did you get so rich? You're a quitter, man!
Herman Blume: I spent eight million dollars on this.
Max Fischer: And is that all you're willing to spend?
I saved Latin. What did you ever do?
Herman Blume: She's my Rushmore.
Max Fischer: I know. She was mine too.
Max Fischer: The truth is, neither one of us has the slightest idea where this relationship is going. We can't predict the future.
Rosemary Cross: We don't have a relationship.
Max Fischer: But we're friends.
Rosemary Cross: Yes, and that's all we're *going* to be. Well, yes...
Max Fischer: That's all I meant by "relationship." You want me to grab a dictionary?
Max Fischer: So you were in Vietnam?
Herman Blume: Yeah.
Max Fischer: Were you in the shit?
Herman Blume: Yeah, I was in the shit.
Max Fischer: What do you call getting a handjob from Mrs. Calloway in the back of her Jaguar?
Magnus Buchan: A fucking lie.
Max Fischer: You think I got kicked out because of just the aquarium? Nah, it was the handjob. And you know what else? It was worth it.
Herman Blume: What's the secret, Max?
Max Fischer: The secret?
Herman Blume: Yeah, you seem to have it pretty figured out.
Max Fischer: The secret, I don't know... I guess you've just gotta find something you love to do and then... do it for the rest of your life. For me, it's going to Rushmore.
Maybe I'm spending too much of my time starting up clubs and putting on plays. I should probably be trying harder to score chicks.
Max Fischer: I like your nurse's uniform, guy.
Dr. Peter Flynn: These are O.R. scrubs.
Max Fischer: O, R they?
My top schools where I want to apply to are Oxford and the Sorbonne. My safety's Harvard.
Rosemary Cross: Do you think we're going to have sex?
Max Fischer: That's a kinda cheap way to put it.
Rosemary Cross: Not if you've ever fucked before, it isn't.
Rosemary Cross: Has it ever crossed your mind that you're far too young for me?
Max Fischer: It crossed my mind that you might consider that a possibility, yeah.