Got an issue? Here's a tissue.

[to Goldmember] There are only two things I can't stand in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures... and the Dutch.

Austin Powers: Your spy car's a Mini?
Nigel Powers: It's not the size mate, it's how you use it.

Mini-Me: [Mini-Me unzips his pants]
Nigel Powers: My lord! you're a tripod. What you been feedin' that thing, eh? It looks like a baby's arm holding an apple. Good thing is, if you ever get tired, you can use it as a kickstand!

Nigel Powers: [rubs throat] Ow...
Austin Powers: What's wrong with your neck?
Nigel Powers: I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours.
Austin Powers: I thank you!

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