Colonel Oates: Get down and give me infinity.
Bill: There is no way we could possibly do infinity push-ups.
Ted: Well maybe if he lets us do them girly-style...

...and very important, DO NOT do your homework without wearing headphones. Repeat...

Rufus

I got a full-on robot chubby.

Evil Ted

You're not strong! You're silky boys! Silk comes from the butts of Chinese Worms!

Colonel Oates

Bill: I'm Bill S. Preston, Esquire!
Ted: And I'm Ted "Theodore" Logan!
Bill, Ted: And we are... WYLD STALLYNS!

[rapping] You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you'll dance with the reaper.

Grim Reaper

Bill: Hey Ted? Wanna play 20 questions?
Ted: Okay! I got one!
Bill: Is it a mineral?
Ted: Yeah!
Bill: Are you a tank?
Ted: Whoa! Yeah!

Ted: Your stepmom's cute.
Bill: Shut up Ted.
Ted: Remember when she was a senior and we were freshmen?
Bill: Shut UP, Ted!
Ted: Remember when I asked your mom to the prom?
Bill: Shut UP, Ted!

Like sands of the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.

Socrates [speaking Greek]

Grim Reaper: I believe Colonel Mustard did it in the study with a candlestick.
Bill: Sorry, death, you lose! It was Professor Plum!
Grim Reaper: I said Plum!
Ted: No way! You said Mustard! Can we go back now?
Grim Reaper: Uh, best three out of five!
Ted: I don't believe this guy!

Want a Twinkie, Genghis Khan?

Be excellent to each other. ...And... party on, dudes!

Abraham Lincoln

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