Nicholas Angel: What's the situation?
DS Andy Wainwright: Two blokes and a fuck load of cutlery!

Danny Butterman: Do you want anything from the shop?
Nicholas Angel: Cornetto

Danny Butterman: [after supposedly stabbing Sgt. Angel, waving a sachet of tomato ketchup] Da daaa!
Nicholas Angel: Danny, this is murder.
Danny Butterman: It's not murder, it's ketchup.
Nicholas Angel: We have to do something, Frank's appointed himself as Judge, Jury and Executioner.
Danny Butterman: [agitated and defensive] He is not Judge Judy and Executioner

Ever fired your gun in the air and yelled, 'Aaaaaaah?'

Danny Butterman

Nicholas Angel: [turning around to face a group of school children] Are there any questions?
Danny Butterman: [sitting at the back of a group of school children] Is it true that there's a point on a man's head where if you shoot it, it will blow up?

Nicholas Angel: I didn't mean to upset the apple cart.
DS Andy Cartwright: Oh yeah, cause we all sell apples around here, don't we?
Sergeant Turner: You do sell apples don't you?
DS Andy Cartwright: Yeah, and raspberries.

Danny Butterman: Point Break or Bad Boys II?
Nicholas Angel: Which one do you think I'll prefer?
Danny Butterman: No, I mean which one do you wanna watch first?

[Looking at a suspicious-looking passerby]
Nicholas Angel: All right, what about this guy? Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?
Danny Butterman: He's fuck-ugly.
Nicholas Angel: Or, he doesn't want you to see his face.
Danny Butterman: Yeah, it's 'cause he's fuck-ugly.

Danny Butterman: What's it like being stabbed?
Nicholas Angel: It was the single most painful experience of my life
Danny Butterman: [nodding] What's the second most painful?

I think you will find me a slasher... of prices!

Simon Skinner

Nicholas Angel: You don't mind a bit of manpower, do ya Doris?
PC Doris Thatcher: [laughing] Oh, cheeky bastard!

What's the matter, Danny? Never taken a shortcut before?
[proceeds to leap over a series of backyard fences]

Nicholas Angel

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