Chili Palmer: How did you get in here?
Ray Bones: It was easy. I told 'em I was you, I acted real stupid and they believed me.

Chili Palmer: Hey, Karen, how you doing?
Karen Flores: What are you doing here?
Chili Palmer: Listen, I wanted to come by and apologize for breaking in the way I did last night.
Karen Flores: So, let me get this straight. You broke in again to apologize for breaking in before?
Chili Palmer: No, no. Your patio door was open. And you shouldn't do that because you got a lot of nice things in this house.
Karen Flores: Well, make sure you lock it on your way out.

Chili Palmer: Martin, look at me.
Martin Weir: I'm looking at you
Chili Palmer: No, look at me the way I'm looking at you.

Harry Zimm: I said I'd think about it. In this town, what does that mean? Nothing!
Chili Palmer: Well, that's the difference between you and me, Harry. I say what I mean. I want Martin Weir? I go out and get Martin Weir. I don't fuck around with this bullshit with the trainer's shrink.

Chili Palmer: What is that?
Rental Car Attendant: It's an Oldsmobile Silhouette.
Chili Palmer: I ordered a Cadillac.
Rental Car Attendant: Oh, well, you got the Cadillac of minivans.

Karen Flores: Weren't you scared back there?
Chili Palmer: You bet.
Karen Flores: You don't act like it.
Chili Palmer: Well, I was scared then, but I'm not scared now. How long do you want me to be scared?

Ronnie Wingate: Excuse me bro', but who the fuck are you?
Chili Palmer: I'm the one tellin' you how it is...

Ray "Bones" Barboni: [noticing Ronnie likes to flash his gun a lot] You must be one of those quick-draw artists, the way you've got your gun down on your belt like that.
Ronnie Wingate: Whatta you got there, a Wop 9? Fuckin' Fiat of guns, always jammin' on you at the wrong time.
[Bones nods, smiles and shoots him 4 times]

Karen Flores: I know I'm better than what I've been doing all these years, walking around in fuck-me pumps and a tank-top, waiting until it was time to scream.
Chili Palmer: Yeah, but what a scream.
Karen Flores: Oh yeah, it's a real talent. Look, all I'm saying is, what I wouldn't give for the chance to say one really great line. You know, like in that great Bette Davis movie where she says, "I'd kiss you...”
Chili Palmer: "But I just washed my hair."

Bo Catlett: Mr. Escobar, maybe your nephew panicked and took off.
Mr. Escobar: Why are you talking to me this bullshit? I think maybe I have Ramon and Cesar staple your tongue to your chin! What do you think?
Bo Catlett: I think you speak very good English, Mr. Escobar.

Bo Catlett: Harry called you his associate. What exactly does that mean? I mean, I never heard your name, or read it in Variety, or The Star, or anyplace.
Chili Palmer: It's what he said, I'm his associate.
Bo Catlett: You must bring something heavy to the deal.
Chili Palmer: I do: me.

Bo Catlett: I'd like to introduce my associate, The Bear. Movie stuntman, champion bodybuilder. Throws out things I don't want.
Bear: I think you ought to turn around and head back to Miami.
Chili Palmer: So you're a stuntman, huh?
Bear: Yeah.
Chili Palmer: You any good?
Bear: Am I any good?
[He turns to Bo, laughing. Chili grabs him by the balls, then throws him down the stairs]
Chili Palmer: That's not bad for a guy his size.

FREE Movie Newsletter