Enrique Salvatore: Don't stomp your little last season Prada shoes at me, honey.
Elle: These aren't last season!
[looks down, gasps, runs back to court]
Elle: He's gay! Enrique is gay!

Vivian: Nice outfit.
Elle: Oh, I like your outfit too, except when I dress up as a frigid bitch, I try not to look so constipated.

Hi. I'm Elle Woods and this is Bruiser Woods. We're both Gemini vegetarians.

Elle

I just don't think that Brooke could've done this. Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't.

Elle

Elle: Is that low-viscosity rayon? With a half-loop top stitching on the hem?
Boutique Saleswoman: Of course. It's one of a kind.
Elle: It's impossible to use a half-loop stitching on low-viscosity rayon. It would snag the fabric. And you didn't just get it in - I saw it in the June Vogue a year ago. So if you're trying to sell it to me for full price, you've picked the wrong girl.

If you're going to let one stupid prick ruin your life... you're not the girl I thought you were.

Professor Stromwell

Oh, my God, the bend and snap works every time!

Maurice

Elle: Did you see him? He's probably still scratching his head.
Paulette: Yeah, which must be a nice vacation for his balls.

Brooke: You know a Delta Nu would never sleep with a man who wears a thong.
Elle: Never!
Brooke: I just liked to watch him change the filter.

Professor Callahan: Do you think she woke up one morning and said: I think I'll go to law school today.

Elle's Mother: Honey, you were First Runner-Up at the "Miss Hawaiian Tropic" contest. Why are you going to throw that all away?
Elle: Going to Harvard is the only way I'm going to get the love of my life back.
Elle's Father: Oh, sweetheart, you don't need law school. Law school is for people who are boring and ugly and serious. And you, button, are none of those things.

The rules of hair care are simple and finite. Any Cosmo girl would have known.

Elle

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