Artie, Lin is not a killer. She's just a really, really, really hot, confused, Chinese girl.

Roy

We come from America. You might have heard of it? We run your jerkwatter country.

Roy

Prostitute: [trying to woo Roy] I'll give you a discount.
Roy: That's the most romantic thing a woman has ever said to me.

[to Charlie] Ever heard of parents? We have parents who love us. You don't, 'cause you're an orphan

Roy

[to Nelson] No matter how far you are from the throne, you'll always be number one in our hearts.

Doyle

Roy: Well, what's in it for you?
Lord Rathbone: Your looking at the future king of England.
Roy: You're, like, 20th line to the throne.
Lord Rathbone: 10th. But my friend here is about to change all that.

Roy, you're about to die. You're on the minute hand of a clock. My life is flashing before my eyes. Wait a minute. I don't remember her.

Roy

Roy: Lord, help me. Just let me know you're there. Love me, hate me, but let me know you're up there.
[pause]
Roy: Hey, I can see our hotel from here. Wow.

Doyle: It's hopeless. We'll never get past the guards.
Roy: Well, not with that attitude, we won't.

So what are we gonna do? Come on, think! I'm not going to an English prison. With my feathery blond hair and Chon's athletic build, they'll try to make us the bell of the ball.

Roy

Chon Wang: Roy! There you are. Need anything, buddy?
Roy: A whole lot of "leave me alone."

She's gonna fight my battles for me.

Roy

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