Here is the list of things to do while I'm away. Batteries need to be replaced. Toys in the bottom of the chest need to be rotated. Oh, and make sure everyone attends Mr. Spell's seminar on what to do if part of you is swallowed. Okay? Okay, good, okay.


Woody once risked his life to save mine, and I couldn't call myself his friend if I wasn't willing to do the same. Now who's with me?

Buzz Lightyear

Woody: Hey, w-wait, What happened? What happens next? Come on, let's see the next episode!
Stinky Pete the Prospector: That's it.
Woody: What?
Stinky Pete the Prospector: The show was cancelled after that.
Woody: Wait, wait, wait. What about the gold mine and... and the cute little critters and the dynamite? That was a great show! I mean, why cancel it?
Stinky Pete the Prospector: Two words: Sput-nik. Once the astronauts went up, children only wanted to play with space toys.
Woody: I know how that feels.

Buzz Lightyear: Good work, men. Two blocks down and only nineteen more to go.
Mr. Potato Head: What?
Rex, Hamm, Slinky Dog: Nineteen?
Mr. Potato Head: Are we gonna do this all night? My parts are killing me.
Buzz Lightyear: Come on, fellas. Did Woody give up when Sid had me strapped to a rocket?
Rex, Hamm, Mr. Potato Head, Slinky Dog: No.
Buzz Lightyear: No. And did he give up when you threw him out of the back of that moving van?
Mr. Potato Head: Oh, you had to bring *that* up!
Buzz Lightyear: No, he didn't! We have a friend in need, and we're not going to rest until he's safe in Andy's room! Now, let's move out!

Alien toys: Strangers! From the outside! Ooooh!
Buzz Lightyear: Oh, not this again...

Buzz: Right now, poised at the edge of the galaxy, Emperor Zurg has been secretly building a weapon with the destructive capacity to annihilate an entire planet! I alone have information that reveals this weapon's only weakness. And you, my friend, are responsible for delaying my rendezvous with Star Command!
Woody: [pauses and looks incredulous] YOU! ARE! A! TOYYYYY! You're not the real Buzz Lightyear! You're - you are an action figure!
[holds hand up to eyes indicating something small]
Woody: You are a child's play-thing!
Buzz: You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity. Farewell.
[starts to walk away]
Woody: Oh, yeah? Well, good riddance, ya loony!

What if Andy gets another dinosaur? A mean one? I don't think I can take that kind of rejection.


Mr. Potato Head: How come you don't have a laser, Woody?
Woody: It's not a laser. It's a little light bulb that blinks.
Hamm: What's wrong with him?
Mr. Potato Head: Laser envy.

Woody: Look, we're all very impressed with Andy's new toy.
Buzz: Toy?
Woody: T-O-Y, toy.
Buzz: Excuse me, I think the word you're searching for is "space ranger".
Woody: The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there's preschool toys present.

What chance does a toy like me have against a Buzz Lightyear action figure?


Mr. Potato Head: Oh, really? Well, I'm from Playskool.
Rex: And I'm from Mattel. Well, actually I'm from a smaller company that was purchased by Mattel in a leveraged buyout.

That wasn't flying! That was... falling with style!


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