John McClane: Why me? What he's got to do with me?
Inspector Cobb: I have no idea, he just said it had to be you.
John McClane: It's nice to be needed.

Oh, boy... am I glad you talked me out of jumping.

Zeus

John McClane: Does this shit have airbags?
Zeus: Your side does, I don't know about mine... McClane!

Zeus: Who was the 21st President?
John McClane: I don't know.
Zeus: You don't know?
John McClane: No, I don't know! Do you know?
Zeus: No!

Listen to me. Hang the fuck on, all right?

John McClane

Zeus: I have to answer... that phone.
Transit cop: Get 'em up!
Zeus: Look, if you have to shoot me, then you go ahead and you shoot me! But I have to answer this phone, all right?

Zeus: [picks up the phone] I'm here.
Simon: And McClane?
Zeus: He's on his way. He's a little slow. He's out of shape.
Simon: The rules applied to the both of you. I'm afraid this is non-compliance. Goodbye.
Zeus: [to cops] Trust me guys. Duck.

John McClane: They told me to stay on the line.
Simon: Ha! God I love this country!
John McClane: You know, your brother was an asshole.
Simon: Yeah, he was an asshole. You got his number.

Zeus: What the fuck are you doin'?
John McClane: Interrogatin' him.
Zeus: Well, what's he gonna tell you, "I'm dead"?
John McClane: Well, I ain't gonna know 'til I ask him, am I?

John McClane: Hey, partner!
Zeus: I ain't your partner. I ain't your neighbor, your brother, or your friend. I'm your total stranger.

Simon: I want you and the Samaritan at the corner of 72nd and Broadway in 15 minutes. You understand?
John McClane: Yeah, I understand. I understand that you're a fucking wacko who likes to play kids' games.
Simon: Hahdly.
John McClane: [imitating Simon] Hahdly? Well, what have you got against me anyway? What did I bring you in for? Shoplifting? Purse-snatching?

Dr. Schiller: They want you to know who's doing it to you, so this name Simon is probably not an alias. It's probably Simon or some variation.
Joe Lambert: [reading rap sheet] Simon, Robert E. Convicted of kidnapping and extortion, 10-15. Served 7 years on good behavior. Released on parole two months ago.
John McClane: Bob Simon is a bankrupt businessman who kidnapped his partner's daughter. He's a fuck-up, not a psycho. The guy we're looking for is nuts.

FREE Movie Newsletter