Morgue Worker: Hey. You're supposed to do that at the morgue.
John McClane: Not anymore. Got a new SOP for DOA's from the FAA.

[to Al] Take that fucking Twinkie out of your mouth...

John McClane

Carmine Lorenzo: Lorenzo, Terminal Police. You want something, you got it.
John McClane: This is it? One fucking platoon?
Grant: One crisis, one platoon. Who are you?
John McClane: John McClane.
Grant: McClane, you showed some balls out there, man.
John McClane: Yea.

Trudeau: McClane, I know how you must feel.
John McClane: I wanted to help those people tonight. I was pretty goddamn useless.

John McClane: Excuse me, officers, this may seem like a wild goose chase but I think I just saw...
Sgt. Vito Lorenzo: Saw what?
John McClane: Elvis. Elvis Presley.

Holly, here's your fucking landing light. Woo.

John McClane

Rent-A-Car Girl: I'm closing off in an hour. Do you want to get a drink?
John McClane: [shows his wedding ring] Just the fax, ma'am. Just the fax.

Stewardess: What did you do to him?
Holly McClane: I knocked two of his teeth out.
Stewardess: Would you like some champagne?

Holly McClane: Honey, this is the '90s. Y'know, microchips, microwaves, air phones.
John McClane: As far as I'm concerned, progress peaked with frozen pizza.

Samantha Coleman: You give me this story and I'll have your baby.
John McClane: Not the kind of ride I'm looking for.

Holly McClane: Listen Dick... That is your name - "Dick"? If you're gonna continue to get this close would you consider switching aftershaves?
Richard Thornburg: Anything else?
Holly McClane: Stronger mouthwash would be nice.

Col. Stuart: Oh, McClane. John McClane. The policeman hero who saved the Nakatomi hostages. I read about you in People Magazine. You seemed a bit out of your league on Nightline, I thought.
John McClane: Hey, Colonel. Blow me! How much drug money is Esperanza paying you to turn traitor?
Col. Stuart: I think Cardinal Richilieu said it best. 'Treason is merely a matter of dates'. This country has to learn that it can't keep cutting off the legs of men like General Esperanza. Men who have the guts to stand up against Communist aggression.
John McClane: And Lesson #1 starts with killing policemen. What's Lesson #2, the neutron bomb?
Col. Stuart: No. I think we can come up with something in between. Watch this!

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