Once again, the L.A.P.D. is asking Los Angelenos not to fire their guns at the visitor spacecraft. You may inadvertently trigger an interstellar war.

Video Newscaster

Good God...I'm on Mars.

John Carter

You gotta look at this philosophical. Some you win... and Dim Sum, you lose.

Maurice

Memphis: Roger, I have a problem...
Roger the Car Salesman: Yes?
Memphis: I've been in L.A. for three months now. I have money, I have taste. But I'm not on anybody's "A" list, and Saturday night is the loneliest night for the week for me.
Roger the Car Salesman: Well, a Ferrari would certainly change that.
Memphis: Perhaps, Mmmm. But, you know, this is the one. Yes, yes yes... I saw three of these parked outside the local Starbucks this morning, which tells me only one thing. There's too many self-indulgent wieners in this city with too much bloody money! Now, if I was driving a 1967 275 GTB four-cam...
Roger the Car Salesman: You would not be a self-indulgent wiener, sir... You'd be a connoisseur.
Memphis: Precisely. Champagne would fall from the heavens. Doors would open. Velvet ropes would part.

Willie: There are two dead people in here!
Indiana Jones: There's gonna be two dead people in here! Hurry!

Indiana Jones: Stay behind me, Short Round. Step where I step, and don't touch anything.
Short Round: I step where you step! I touch nothing!

Listen you snot-nose little shit, I was takin' shrapnel in Khe Sanh when you were crappin' in your hands and rubbin' it on your face.

Pappas

Life sure has a sick sense of humor, doesn't it?

Bodhi

You want to compare brainpans? I won the Westinghouse prize when I was 12, big deal. Published at 19, so what. I got a double doctorate from MIT at 22, Chemistry and Geology. I taught at Princton for two and a half years. Why do I do this? Because the money's good, the scenery changes and they let me use explosives, ok?

Rockhound

Jason Bourne: Who am I?
Conklin: You're U.S. Government property. You're a malfunctioning $30 million weapon. You're a total goddamn catastrophe, and by God, if it kills me, you're going to tell me how this happened.

Thelma: Louise, shoot the radio
Louise: [she fires at the radio]
Thelma: The POLICE radio, Louise!

You know as well as I do decisions made in real time are never perfect. Don't second guess an operation from an armchair.

Noah Vosen

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